Sam & ????

zzz

2009-06-12T22:19:00.001+08:00

thursday ...

rest at home and slack lo... then play game... lol...

Friday....

nv go camp cos tired... actually wanan take mc but end up nv take... lol... lazy to go take... then play game.... do project study and read my books... keke... jie jie.. my exams results are out.. forensic i got A... java i got A too... ethical hacking i got B... keke.. left these 3 modules and finish le... wahhaha... then nx yr degree... ^.^ hmm... sms with her and she's quite kind of happi for my results... i wish she can do it like me too.. keke... ^.^ maybe later going out for a while.... see how lo... update later...

o.0

2009-06-11T14:36:00.002+08:00

Hey jie sry to skip blogging... lol.. was very tired and lazy....

Tuesday and Wednesday...

Go camp and go home early noon and slp... till evening... very tired.... these few days she's sick... >.< heartpain... lol.... but i hope she's getting better and the weather is getting cooler too... too hot le la... -.- was talking in camp and my friend told me about his marriage life etc.... nowadays the youngsters in sg... all fucktub.... pple got wife also wan tackle etc... fucktub man.... too many stories to say.... and i got some hints and tips when getting married ... lol.... lazy to say cos too many too..... hmmm... life in reservits suxs cos boring dunno wat to do... but nt bad la... i tell my schedule u also say fun lol..... morning 8.45-9 report.. show face... nth to do go home liao... LMAO... everyday liek this...

Thursday....

go camp and slack... do nth ... slp till 1.... then wake up eat and come home le lo... =p update later jie...

zzz

2009-06-09T00:31:00.002+08:00

Sry jie,... tired ar...

Saturday....

I forgot where i went and wat i did lol... sorry jie....
but i know i was tired...

Sunday...

Woke up at 9+ and met aung and diniesh at cck library to do our project , assigments.. went home around 2+ .... went to find a friend around 4+... then stayed and helped up and helped to clean crystals till around 8+... i cut my little fingers ... around 7 little deep cuts... so pain pain >.< went home and fell asleep till 2+ and went to bath cos too hot and slp again lo....

Monday...

today go camp and slack... went for orientation etc... went home and met velon and wee kiat... then went railway mall to eat ... and was introduced to her investments and plans... etc... juz reac home around 12...

i think i am missing her so so so much... omg... she's sick today >.<>.< miss u lots and slp tite... sweet dreams too ^.^
Alright jie.... i gonna facebook a while and go slp le... 2molo muz book in again zzzz... nite nite in advance :P

2009-06-06T14:15:00.003+08:00

jiejie sry for nt potsting in these 2 days..... tired and busy.......

Thursday...

Went for an appointment and yeah chatted with the client and he intending to get 800 pieces of software... then i went to tanjong pagar to teach the 2nd time..... stress... lesson today was quite good and relaxing... ^.^... after that met a friend and 2 more of his friends for pool then we went batok to find a friend but he's nt around... so we went to find another friend at tech whye but he's also not around wtf.... then we went to eat at geylang... nice ba ku teh and herbal chicken then we went to his 2 friend's place where they are working there... we drank till aorund 1 and went home... we drank a jug of beer and my fav cologne blue keke... then we went home and my friend was a merlin juz now LOL..... so so funni the scene... really is ROFL LMAO ....

Friday...

yesterday was a sleepy day for me... i woke up around 2+ ... then went to a friend's sch to eat but he ordered wrongly so i dun wanna eat and end up i ordered another dish... and i finished them all... then i went to batok... today i have learnt so so so so many things... heehee... i will always remember them well and cherish it... i learnt so many lessons and hints from GOD ... then we went home around 9 and we went for 3 games of snooker and go home lo.... cos tired... keke.....so i did all my stuff and slp around 5....

jzu woek up at 12+ and was woken up by many sms and miss calls... ><>.<

zzz

2009-06-03T12:04:00.003+08:00

morning jie... lol.... woke up around 11+.... then play facebook games... LOL... i login the blog and see... LOL... SHE removed all may's post and removed pics settings etc.... LMAO... dare to read dun dare to reply or comment... PUI.... GO FUCK SPIDER PLS...... anyway i am feeling ok... dun worry about me jie.... yeah... yr status means about me... HAHA... but dun worry la... i got enough backup and power and etc to play the game... i am well prepared for this .... ^.^ not to worry jie... maybe i will juz be prepared and stop ...^.^ anyway jie... i going out soon cya ...=p miss u and miss her so much... kekekeke

zzzzz

2009-06-03T02:04:00.003+08:00

jie... hihi.... today was quite a boring day lol.... i woke up and chatted on facebook and then went to meet a long long long lost friend... we had meal 2gether and chatted... LOl... it's quite fun actually to meet up and chat... haha... but in my heart i told myself.... i will miss all these things soon.... i will be leaving sg..... then i went to hillview... today's session was okok... then got home and my buddie called me his 2 lappys are spoilt... and arrr.... i got 4 lappys to do... 2 my buddie's 2 my customer... i finished all of them around 1.45.... and ya.. i am going to bath and slp... 2molo long day ...-.-'''''

i then was quite pissed and wanted to coment in HER facebook wall.... but something told me not to.... so i posted in personal blog....this is how it goes...

"Hey... i decided to type her cos it's better that it's between both of us... i wanted to wall on yr facebook but i think u should deserve some respect too.... so i did not and typed here... if i did... it will make u feel bad... trust me...So stop hiding and avoiding.... It's time to face the fact and talk things out... i dun wanan use a way that will make everything goes bad or make u look bad.... i think i am nt happi for it that's why i wanan talk things out... but it's always better this way in order to prevent me from doing things in future....
I know so so so many things...u know i know almost 95% of all things that had happened since march but i tend to keep quiet..... i juz wanan see how u react and solve this..... like my facebook status said.... i got lots of evidence, pics, logs,statements etc... nevermind where i got them from but they juz come to me eventually... u will be suprised and shocked that i can to an extend post them all in facebook or tag u with rude and bad remarks against u...i do nt wanna do things till like this... i can but i choose nt too.... it will be a big war after this and i will make sure this chess starts and no one will get anything good out of it....even i have to suffer or die or watever i also dun care.... i will do things my way for the 1st and last time....juz to let u know... u really did make me damn pissed off when all these happens and it's already overshot my limit x100000000 times.... i had so many ways of doing things but luckily GOD and good friends saved me by talking to me....
so i wish u all the best.... if u think it's a good time to meet up, sit down and have a good chat and take couple of your hours... it will juz be great.....so feel free to juz sms or email me when u can... cos i will nt be in singapore for long..... "

it was already to my limit... LOl... i am nt happi ya.... but if i dun say it out i nt happi seriously and i know i wll seek revenge.... -.-" so i am doing it to maybe let me understand... like my friend said... i am someone who onli wants explanations and answers ..... quite true perhaps... anyway ... i am gonna bath and slp le jie... nt wanting to talk much... lol... sorry =x nitenite jie... ^.^

zzzz

2009-06-02T03:19:00.002+08:00

hey jie... juz free to update ..... actually juz now evening when i got home i fell asleep till 6.15 then i went to sch after a bath....i met aung and diniesh at mac again... zzz then we went to class....class ended at 10.15 today ... zzzzzzzzzzzz we then went home and i did my stuff... my work.... my sch work... zzzz then leh...kagero called and we chatted again...^.^

yeah i got chat with an old old friend... 15 yrs ago... she's angie's fren... we chatted and ya she remember who am i... lol.... like is so bad for us this yr... for those born in the year of dog... lol.... but nvm ba.... i think GOD have plans for all of us.... ^.^ i suddenlt though of something... i stated that in facebook... "You need sufficient n relevant evidence to bring someone to trial.(what i learn in forensic class). I have lots of evidence of time,pics,logs,statments ,etc... but can i bring them to trial? Is justice always fair? Will time play a part too? Let's See........ ^.^" i find it true.... when can i prosecute a person ... when can i bring a person to trail even if i have evidence?? lol... nvm me... that's kind of random... hmmm...... jie... i am tired le... i think i shall pray before i go to bed and 2molo wake up do my sch work and exercise.... i am going to slp le jie... nitenite and sweet dreams to u and her... keke... ^.^

1st day teaching....

2009-06-01T22:48:00.000+08:00

hey jie... sorry nv update yesterday.... haha... yesterday was tiring... >.< slp around 4+.... need to prepare my notes etc for class 2molo... haha....
Yesterday went to friend's place and talk talk... heng ar .... wanna buy 4d heng i nv buy if nt tio EAT.... but hor her bday open ... sian nv buy haha.... but nvm.... then fetched a friend to causeway pt and talked throughout the journey.... oooooo beginning to gain more knowlegde and wisdom....keke.... then fetch 2 more friends on the way.... arrrr.... they eat dinner le... i haven eat....=( ke lian hor me..... then we went for number ball... keke.... after playing we went to have my DINNEr and their supper... and went home.... reach home around 1.... then after my bath.... kagero called again... >< .... but this time i use house phone to call LOL.... cheaper mah.... and my dad juz got a cordless phone ..so we chatted till 4..... and i was so tired and sleepy and went to bed after our conversation....

Today woke up at 12.... prepared my things etc... and off i went to tanjong pagar... the venue changed to there instead of shenton way.... before class i was very very very very stress.... omgomg..... then i sms her..... keke... i think i will do well ba.... from her encouragement i think i can do it... =p

my class had a total number of 17 students.... uncles and aunties ranging from 40-60.... i introduced myself as Sam.... but all of them still call me LAO SHI....i was thinking i think i might be younger then some of yr sons or daughters.... so dun call me lao shi la... LOL..... and keep asking me questions like how old am i la... am i married ... how long am i in IT line la... etc.... they were quite impressed when i answered them... -.-" i was like... wtf... then i decided to make the class more unity and lively and told them before we start we will have an introduction??? i dunno correct or wrong but they seem to be laughing and joking around when that happen.... hehe.... happi ar me....lol... then break was around 3+.... and i wanted to have a smoke and drink and too bad for me.... some of them keep asking me questions and end up i nv go...... and luckily before class started .... a auntie bought me a bottle of mineral water... class resumed and i seem to have the love of teaching.... i was very happi that by the end of the class... all of them know what are what and what are the purpose of them.... i am very very satisfied and happi... keke... class ended around 4+ and i need to submit their attendance etc.... after that i went home and it's already 5+ when i got home.... i logged into facebook and listen to music and slack a while.... ooo jiejie... i am going to sch later .... shall update later ok??

afternoon

2009-05-31T16:17:00.006+08:00

hi jie... yesterday forget to update sorry... was very tired.... yesterday i went to meet a friend to see his laptop.... spoil o.... then we went to help a group of friends to transport things.... then we went for snooker session... after that we went to eat a home cooked food by another friend and not bad... quite LOL...after all we left at 12... i got home did my stuff and etc..... so so tired and fell asleep around 4+..... nicole called me at 10+ but i was busy so she said she will call me when she got back... if she did nt call means she's slping and tired and will talk to me other days.... she wanna know how r things going for me... and something like updating her... >.<
kagero called me and we chatted for almost close to 2 hrs again... omg my hp is gonna BOOM but it;s worth it .... keke.... i think we are getting closer and better ....let's see what it is in future ba.... keke....i was pissed off by HER las nite... due to certain reasons...but nvm... forget it... COS SHE SUXS.... KNN... SURE FUCKING CURSE THAT THEY GET RETRIBUTION GAO GAO... LOL..... i tend to worry for her sometimes but.... it's like 80% of me is forgettign her... still got 20%... and i am trying very very hard to get rid of the 20%.... Jiayou to me hor jie... KEKE.... i am thinking is GOD arranging all these??? Is she too good for me or am i too good for her so things turn out liek this??? LOL... DUN CARE LA......

jie.... my mind still nt clear sia...i tend to know who and wat i wan but hor... i am greedy.... zzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh sigh sigh... jiayou to me... >.<
i juz woke up at 4+.... so song to slp till so long... LOL.... that's great... going out later to chill and shall update 2nite... cya jie... ^.^

Morning !!!!!

2009-05-30T11:05:00.002+08:00

Rise and shine jie.... keke.... i woke up due to rain... LOL... cos i very very cold.... and my blanket is on the other side of the bed... zzzz....then i woke up... i am hunrgy and tired... -.-"mom then called ask me to close the windows and i said i close liao.... then i remembered mom told me... nx week onwards she will hardly come back...she ask me to help with the housework.... orh... i am waiting for them to be back before i can leave... a friend of mine will be buying a new laptop maybe... o.0... hmmm..... then was doing quiz while waiting on facebook.... lol... some are quite true some and fake... -.-" funni ar... LOL... ok jie... i will update again 2nite... cya.... ^.^ hope u enjoy yr weekends.....^.^

Updating again...

2009-05-30T03:33:00.002+08:00

Hey jie... today was a good day for me.... i slp till 3+ then i wake up lol... super shiok... i remember i dream of myself on the bed... no strength to get up... i woke up a while and really no strength..... then i went back to slp..... i did my stuff and exercise ... then i went to buy something... i saw a friend and she told me about her friend's problem... so much worst then me... may GOD bless her... >.<.... hope everything goes well for her frend too..... i then went to sch..... tomolo is aung's birthday.... so i have planned to get my classmates to get a cake for him....

We had cake ,curry puffs and drinks before lesson 2gether with our lecturer... pictuires are in facebook....after class i went home...i watched movies and did some of my sch work.... then i went to bath at 3.30... now is around 3.45....

i remembered that i listen to her and stop buying 4d and ya... heng i nv buy ... cos wed if i buy i will be angry again... LOL... miss by 1 digit again... Heng ar....i also remembered KYRIE called me... jie u remember her right??? LOl... she jio me play online game 2gether and ask me to meet her before she leaves singapore... she's going to taiwan to work and ya.... she's a full time model now....not like las time part time... LOl... maybe i will meet her maybe not... -.-" i still tend to remember those things she did before... zzzz...

around 2+.... Kagero called me.... Jie u know her right??? i think u onli seen her once....i think was around 2006???? LOL... she's doing fine in japan now... we chatted for almost 2 hrs on the phone and omg... my bill will pile up again LOL... but nvm it's worth o....... she's doing fine now... a part time teacher from what i heard from her... and she's also having her own business (clothes).... that's good to hear from her... and she said it will be good if u join me on october to visit her too??? will u be able to make it???she wans me to accompany her on her birthday this oct... ^.^ so happen it falls on "OUR" anniversary... LOL... HAHA....and what is it is that she is still not attached... LOL.... =x i send her tons of my pics thorugh email and she said i look younger and neater... LOL.... =x... she forced me to send her and she dun wanan send me....... kanna trick... but i have a feeling that she's prettier and prettier.... LOL... ya.... her english is improving tremendously.... now i think she can speak like maybe malaysian standard.... very nt bad hor... LOL... she also told me that she will be calling me more often... -.-" i asked her why and she said she juz wanan talk to me more... to share with me her weekly life... and i think my bill will pile up more and i muz quickly change PLAN... LOL....she said some things that made me touched too..... omg... but i cannot say out... cos is between us... KEKE.....i tend to somehow think of her while bathing and miss her.... OMG... i am missing 2 pple.... i know the "Her" is still in my mind... omg.... jie.... i am greedy??? zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz haiz.... dun think so much better la hor.... who knows maybe she's my wife... and that SHE is very .....(critical) dunno who... LOL...

jie i really wish now is sep or oct.... so i know i will be going to aus and japan soon and my studies will be over and i will wait for my degree to start... i really need a BREAK..... i am still nt thinking of how i should study my degree... zzzz omg omg... but nvm... 1 step at a time... zzzzzzzzz nx mth reservist somemore... 2 weeks... FUCK..... omg omg omg..... what should i do... zzzz hai... jie i lazy to think and tired le... i go slp... now 4am... 2molo still muz wake up at 10.45... nitenite jie... missing pple(S) now lol.... nite nite...

Blur blur me.... >.<

2009-05-29T03:15:00.003+08:00

Hey jie... today was a very tiring day for me........ i woke up around 7.45... bath... changed ... styled my hair(took me around 5 mins ) ... cannot get what i wan LOL... and went to shenton way to meet a client... he's mr seah's friend... a good customer of mine(Mr seah)... we were supossed to talk about our norton deal.. he's gonna purchase 500 orginal license copies from me...the appointment was 9am.. but we finished around 1.... when i met him.. we did not talk about NORTON... he talked about me, himself and my old problem.... he told me... you are a fine,talented young man who will be very much successful...you are smart and pick things fast.... dun becos of a girl and ruin yr life and career... >.< i was quite happi when he said that but a bit down ... lol... AM I STILL NOT CLEAR???? omg.... i tend to think of what happened recently.... i was thinking if i helped... i will be helping her indirectly maybe??? should i ??? if i help it will maybe save yr repuitation?? if i help will she take things for granted???? i still do not know the answer now if i should help or not help... LOL... let's see how ba.....

then i headed to sim lim square to get many stuff etc... a friend's laptop wanna do then end up he dun wan do... KNN... waste my trip and time and parking fee and petrol there.... then i got a keyboard which is 180$ orginal cos comes with 1 year warranty... after that... i went to eat sim lim square duck rice.... ya... finally eat le... yummy yummy...... then i went to batok to change the keyboard... and wtf.. i told her 180 she dun wan... KNN.. before that i told her close to 200 she said ok... now knn ... then i called my friend he said... most 150... she said 150 also ex.... KNN CB... dulan... then she said 120... so i lan lan pay 30 for her... THIS LESSON TELLS ME... NOT TO TREAT PPLE TOO GOOD AGAIN... KNN... AND DUN TRUST CHINA GIRLS..... AND I WILL FUCKING HATE MORE CHINA GIRLS.... ONLI SOME LA.... i have some china friends... ^.^ i sat around and went back for a while to change cos i am very very hot... then i went to sch...for these laptops really pissed me off... KNN DULAN SIA....

we were late for lessons cos i enquired everything about my degree.... i have so many question marks in my brains.... dunno if i should go overseas or stay in sg.... onli 1 reason that i wil stay is for her.... mostly.... not sure if other reasons will affect my decision in staying.... but mostly i think should be going to UK instead of aus if i really go overseas.... depends.... aus's modules are harder and i need to take 8 modules while UK de, 7 modules and easier also.... out of 7 i think i know 4.... LOL... dunno how sia jie... i am ??? .... lol... so so so dunno how... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

i fetched aung to batok to collect his company van and i went home.... i watched a movie.... the jackie chan de with my idol(Daniel Wu).... oooo.... jackie said something really meaningful....
"Waiting is so much pain and torture. Great, now i know the answer!!" i still dunno the answer although it's quite clear... BUT i dun like things that are not spoken by both parties face to face . it is like incomplete...i went to bath around 3am... now is 3.30.... during my bath.... i keep thinking how??? what ???? when??? should i???? should i not??? muz i???? will i???? omg.... today is like a very ??? day for me....maybe i am too too tired and it made me cannot think well... jie ar jie... what should i do?? how i wish u are beside me now.... so i can ask u and u can straight answer or advice me.... or she is there to speak to me.... i dunno.... i have the feeling that maybe i should stop it.... but.... i love her... omg... what should i do???? depends on GOD again or GOD is letting me decide myself... i have a though that maybe i should juz quietly leave without letting anyone know.... that might be the best... maybe i will do it... but i will still call u jie ... ^.^ no matter what u are still my best jie i ever known..... u were always there(mostly) for me when i was down, or happi etc...anyway... i will slowly think of all of them ba... shall smoke then pray and go to slp... 2molo is the time where i can finally start to exercise... ^.^ keke.... nitenite jiejie...miss you and her lots lots... but miss her more... whahahah.... nitenite... ^.^

Forgot to update =x

2009-05-28T02:10:00.002+08:00

My Idol with My Idol actress.... I cut this hairstyle to be like his... LMAO... =x

In the life to see... if it's nice or ugly LOL.....

Immediately after coming out... i took this shot.... >.< cos it's styled by uncle botak....

before hairstyle juz before i went to cut hair today....

hey hey

2009-05-28T02:01:00.003+08:00

hi jie... hmm.... today after the contractors spoiled my mood... i went to meet a friend and get a laptop from her friend to bring back to repair...then we went to cut hair at international plaza.... after that we went to eat at far east plaza.... LOL..jie my old fav place ar...after that we went to find a friend who's working in town... she said work there stress ar... LOL... good luck to her... and another frend working there today off... lol..they work longer le nx time go find them get discount >.< .... then we went to pray cos i need to go back... my mind and heart keeps telling me to go back... then i prayed and GOD told me the same answer again.... it's so so so fated.. jie some things i cannot say here.... u free then call me i tell u... lol...

after that we headed to yishun for number ball... o.0.... today i got 2 new tudi... they are improving in some ways but due to mood... they failed again... LOL..... i was quite tired at that time and we ended around 10... then i fetched them back and brought another laptop back to repair... reached home around 10.50...

Straight away = see my hair... LOL... and mom said nice... cos SHORT wat... zzz then do the lappy which i suspected either wiring or lcd problem... then solved and did 1 more... now i juz finished repairing the other which was due to harddisk faulty.... after this i gonna slp... very tired... 2molo need wake up at 7+.... go for an important deal... keke.... muz jiayou right me??? hmm..... still did nt talk to her much but.... walk 1 step and see ba..... hopefully GOD knows what i wan... >.< maybe time nt correct yet... see how ba... okok jie... now 2.10... i gonna slp liao update 2molo... ^.^

FUCK THE CONTRACTORS!!!!!

2009-05-27T10:58:00.001+08:00

Jie ar... I AM PISSED OF... FUCKING CONTRACTORS KNOCK THE FUCKING WALL FROM 8am TILL NOW... 11am... HAVEN FINISH KNOCKING.... damn dulan.... dunno need to knock wat fuck knock so long... i shouted and there was silence for 15 mins and the knocking continues.... WTF..... then i dulan woke up at 10+ and blasted my music.... LOL.... but the knocking continues... but softer le.... LOL.... REALLY PISS ME OFF AND SPOIL MY DAY THE FUCKING CONTRACTORS..... gonna go out for lunch le.... update later jie.... ^.^

=x

2009-05-27T02:33:00.002+08:00

Hi jie.... glad u appeared in facebook lol.... so long nv see u on liao... as in 2gether online with me lol.... today was a rainy day in singapore... finally..... for the past few days, weather here SUXS.... so so so damn hot and i survived without aircon... haha.....

Went for lunch at railway mall.... nt bad the mee nx time u come i bring u go eat.. i think it's 24hrs.. ^.^.... then go play number ball with a friend... he's learning LOl... so play lo... then saw his friend and they joined us.... and overall i win 20 bucks.... LOL.... good ar.... lmao... old but my skills still there LOL... nt like las time hor.. =x then went batok and talk talk .... relax.... then go a BIG carpark and eat.... nt so bad the food but not my type... cos i dun eat fish.... zzzzzzzzzzzz then i went rcia.... omg... my group got 1 MP... i think either bukit timah or bukit panjang MP... omfg..... i mzu find his pic and see... LOl...or nx time then i get to know him better and i spoke to 1 auntie who is 60 yrs old and when i look at her she's onli like 40... OMG... realy sia.... i think everyone guess her age also 100% wrong 1..... >.<>.< ....

after that.... came home and do my stuff lo... then i viwawa .... LOL.... u know when u online facebook.... i am, viwawa, smoking, replying yr facebook comment, msn with 3 pple, listening to music, on the phone and planning 2molo's activity... -.- so many multi task... LOl...suddenly i think i improve on that....

hmm.... i notice i also tend to talk to pple and know more and encourage friends... i can give them solutions or advices or answers... but why is it always like this when it comes to me.... i am lost????? lol.. zzzzzzzzzz life is so weird... was talking to a friend and she told me another friend of ours finally got a job... i am so happi to hear that.... 2molo i think after going to cut hair i am going to hop by and see... =x..... i am very happi that GOD had answer my prayers.... u know now jie, before i slp when i pray.... i need to mention so many pple's names... to pray for them.... i hope GOD will really help and guide them.... =) at least i am happi that my friend finally got a job... so so so happi for her.... ^.^ hopefully i can guide her too... omg... it's 2.45 and suddenly it's raining now... GOD.... thank you for today, thank you for everything... thank you ^.^ ok... it's getting late and i am going to zzzz le... update again 2molo jie... 2molo i go take pic after haircut... whahah :P nitenite... miss u too jie... miss her too... sweetdreams to both of u... ^.^

heyhey

2009-05-26T02:32:00.002+08:00

hey jie.... Today life is so fun..... Quite ok la... juz out from a cool bath..... ^.^

Morning went sim lim... then reached home around 2... then went home and slack slack.... then went opposite to eat LAKSA... lol.. nt nice liao... zzzz... then went to sch..... sch today was fun.... learned many new things in class and some applies to my life too.... ^.^... my teacher said... u can USE MY NETWORK WAT.... WOO... finally he said that lol.... then fetched aung home and diniesh and me went to yew tee to ta bao... and back we go...... finished eating fish porridge AGAIN... zzzzzzzzzz then i did my stuff... watched movies and now finally i am reporting to u jie... -.-

Hmm... someone is acting MIA.... LOL... APPEAR OFFLINE ETC.... WAtever i dun give a damn.... to me now... i need to achieve my goal... what i wanna do.... wat i need..... who i want.... who i love.... who will remain in my life and who to leave..... etc.... keke.... i know all liao jie... ^.^
Clever me right.... haha... Ya... the post i posted on facebook is a girl who called me and pissed me off.... she's saying about her... so i very very mad and i said NO MATTER WHAT U DO etc... u pretty or watever also cannot be compared to her.... she is still the best to me... ^.^ fucking angry sia.... although she's very pretty.... clever... too bad..... haha...... Not my cup of tea... ^.^.......

Alright jie... going to slp le.... 2molo going to cut hair.... whahhaha... gonna cut my idol's hairstyle .... lol... =x post 2molo the pics =p

^.^

2009-05-25T02:39:00.002+08:00

Hey jie... today was a tiring day for me... haha.. woke up at 8am... went 2 customer's hse and and earn 280 today ... LOL ... a friend called me and ya.. we went down to return another friend something ... then we went to bukit timah for number ball... o.0
Then i saw a FAT ,UGLY AND SHORT GUY... look at me.. i said u familiar ... he said... u jade bf right?? i said LOL... he asked where is jade... i told him dunno... and i dunno her... she where nt my problem... LOL... NOT MY PROBLEM.... LOL... nt i so bad hor jie but she the one who started it all... so let's continue to play the game... ^^

after that i we went to eat and fetch my friends back and went home for MJMJ... woo... won 70+... LMAo... then facebook and do my stuff... i juz came out after a cool bath... so so so shiok... cos weather in sg now is so freaking HOT....... and i missed my 1st PRIZE FOR 4D TODAY!!!!! ARRRRRRRRRRRRrr....... around 50k+ zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sad sad sad ar... then i sms her... she said if she's me she will stop buying... think i listen to her and stop... =p guai guai hor... lo....she ask me stop the CHESS game i also stop... keke... power of love??? LOL....

ya jie....tell peipei sry... nt i dun wan her to cook for me to eat... but onli eat few pple's cooking from now onwards... LOL.... i scare she get the wrong idea so i said cannot... LOL... but if as normal good good friends yes... i will eat... =p

hmmmm... wondering wanan cut short hair or keep long like las time??? jie u help me think and comment leh... lol.... dunno wanan keep or nt zzzzzz... okok... maybe 2molo going sim lim... get some stuff for customer... ^.^..... i a while more then go slp le... tired ar jie... nitenite... cya..... Nitenite ???? cya ???? miss u too.... see ya u dreamland again =p

ya...

2009-05-24T01:50:00.002+08:00

ya jie.. forget to tell u ... i finally had a dream of her ... keke... i dreamt that we were overseas... dunno where... and onli the 2 of us... we were playing skiing and snow... throwing at each other and building snowmans with not many pple around us.....keke... we built a snowman and snowlady like holding hands... and while skiing... she keeps falling and i keep helping her up and teaching her patiently .... wahahhaha... like really couples??? or married le??? haha..... i know how to ski a bit cos got play b4 mah... then we go back to back and we cooked 2gether and eat 2gether beside the fireplace listening to sentimental songs.... ^.^so sweet and romantic right.... LOl... hopefully it comes true... GOD... pls make this come true... Please........ T.T...

the other dreams before all i dun wan le... even if u ask me to forgive that IDIOT 100% i will cos of her.... i really think now my mind is really clear and i really know who i love now...GOD... is this the big big circle which lasted for 12 yrs and now coming back to me? are u hinting me to cherish it and go for it??? are u hinting that i should ask her and date her cos i missed the chance 12 yrs ago???? >.< pls support and guide me and encourage me GOD... Pls let me success ... let me success in this and in my work and to all my close friends too and family members... ^.^ Thank You GOD....

zzzzzzzzzzz

2009-05-24T00:59:00.002+08:00

Hi Jie.... Juz finished eating 2 packets of maggie mee with 2 eggs, some hotdogs, meatballs and some meat... It really spoils my appetite after such a tiring and long day for me... =(

Today was i think the happiest day of my life... i sms her all the way and she replied me with care and concern and maybe some Love or hint??? keke.... silly boi right yr bro, jie? wakakaka...

Ok... morning i went to lim chu kang to pray to Joanne... i talked to her for almost an hour there... i dun think so long but when i saw my watch ... OMG... it's 9.45...... so it's 1 hr +... sigh... i talked so so so so much things to her... i told her from start to ending and what is happening now.. what i am thinking now etc... and i felt so relieved... then i went home and slp... around 12 i woke up... went to pass something to a friend then go bowling.... o.0.... wa jie ar... my bowling improving so so so much... wakakaka.... now normal normal play 130+ whaha... can jio my bro play liao... haha... after that i wanted to go temple but ... fated... close >.< sigh... GOD dun blame me pls... i will go and pray de... trust me... ^.^...

after that we went to tech whye to eat MALAY chicken rice...not so nice le... 8 yrs back nicer.... haha..... after that we went to somewhere special... and after all i juz reach home at 12.... then i cook mee eat lo... so so so so so super tired and sleepy and dunno wat to say... and SUPER MISS HER... haha... i keep reading the old sms and smiling to myself... keke.... new day tomorrow... NEW LIFE FOR ME AGAIN FROM TODAY ONWARDS.... WAKAKAKKA...

Hopefully.. i can get rid of all her suayness or block them all for her.... and i can make her happi everyday... and i love her more everyday... to love someone is something wonderful and good.... hopefully she also knows that and shower me with love perhaps??? haha... nt wanting to put too much hope... LET GOD DECIDE FOR US BA.... hopefully it's like what a few friends said... it is like a big circle and eventually it comes back to u.... hopefully that big circle which took 12 yrs come back to me eventually cos i missed the chance 12 yrs ago... >.< GOD muz give me lots and lots of strength and courage pls... xie xie all of u GODs above ... ^.^ i update again later :P

zzzzzzzzzzzz

2009-05-22T14:46:00.002+08:00

Afternoon jie... sorry nv update yesterday lol..... yesterday noon i woke up around 2+... then i went to play some snooker and went to pay money and went home... i rode yesterday and was caught in the rain when i got home... zzzzzzzzz we smsed each other and ya... haha... we sms from 2+ till 6+.... then i left for sch as my friend gonna fetch me to sch.... we went to sch and finished lessons around 10... we talked cock and i my classmate fetched me back...

i got home and talked to a friend... she was trying to ask my problem... i told her lo.. but not all... she keep scolding and brainwashing me zzzzz..... we talked till 2+.... almost 4 hrs i guess... i was quite touched that she actually talked and encouraged me.... she say wan intro me her friends LOL... but i say see how ba... then hor... i did my stuff and went to bed... i was was was so tired....

Jie ar... i juz woke up... it's 2.45 now.. HAHA... song hor... but i am still so tired... and i suddenly remember that i did not blog and afraid u will be waiting to see what i type and what i am doing everyday.... haha... dun worry jie...

These 2 days no dream... zzzz dunno y.... is my mind clear now???? haha.... i do nt know... zzzzzzz
i think i need to start my assigments and projects... o.0..... i am gonna change my harddisk maybe 2molo or 2nite... i gonna format my com... haha... change everything... o.0..... see how cos hor... i very very lazy to do it also... hmmm.... jie ar jie... other day i post 1 video in facebook.. u go see ok? so sweet the mtv but i hope like me sia... ending not very good but i dun mind ... haha...ok jie.. i update 2nite ... i have headache now... T.T.... like gonna sick again wtf... zzzzzzzzzzz cya later jie....

nite jie...

2009-05-21T02:53:00.002+08:00

nitenite jie..... today was quite ok ... went to sim lim and do things.. then go fetch a friend li jie then she accompanied me go temple to pray... to thank GOD... ^.^ after that we went to pick weekiat up... and we went to meet yilin.... then go eat at woodlands .... we ate thai food... lol.. nt bad wor... and ya......we had our normal wednesday number ball game... lol... today no win no lose... lol... and li jie is super on form sia... maybe she accompany me go temple... lol... she top winner today....she's so scary today... lol..... jiejie.. nx time u come sg... i intro them to u... they are nice and good pple, (my Supporters) when i was down... i have quite a number of friends to intro to u but... not all... onli some.... ^.^ .....but onli thing they dunno what they want in life now... so maybe i try to guide them if i can?? hahaha..... like so pro sia me... but i think i can share with them about my experiences ba... and i onli tell pple whom are closer and i think are really good frends to me.... although i know quite a number of new frends recently... i still know who are good and bad o...... i wished for my good friends to do well in life now... although we have huge age gap... i find it's better to enlightened them now... maybe it's fate and that's what GOD is arranging??? i duno but i feel it is..... ^.^

reached home around 12+.... then i was surfing the net and oooo... i suddenly remembered so many old songs... and i downloaded them all lol...............hmmm..... i still keep thinking .... do i love anyone now?? am i loving someone now???? i think it is a yes... when i am feeling happi... i wished she's beside me to share the joy 2gether... haha... that's love???? my classmate aung told me if u are happi , u think of a girl u like= u love her....hopefully it's true...i do not wish for so much to happen now... if it's all fated by GOD... then i will go for it... although i know that loving someone so much... u need to fight for it.... i fought for it.... but i got nth out of it... so i will not tend to fight so much liao..... it's the 1st time i lost in a battle -.- .... but...... i dun care much either.... losing that battle let me gained so so so much things and experiences..... i learned so much things too... when we gain something we will lose something and vice versa.....maybe i am getting mature??? or older???? sometimes i find i am naggy zzzzzz i feel like an old man lol........ =x jialat ... i wonder what will happend when i turn 35... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I told pple i will nt love anyone again but.... Why suddenly i find i am loving someone???? is GOD testing me?? is something tempting me??? or is it NOW REALLY THE TRUE LOVE I LOVE???? it's like a big circle... and it comes back to u???? i dunno sia... zzzz these type of things are beyond my knowlegde ..... onli GOD knows.... let's see what am i gonna dream of today... haha... alright... i am going to bed now.... and i will add few more pple in my prayers b4 i slp... ^.^.... i heard a friend said... pple who pray for pple is very strong... say i am superstitious or wat... i still believe in it... without GOD... there will be no world... there will nt be people... there will nt be US.... so.... i will onli do and think of what i think is correct and hopefully my prayers will be answered.... ^.^.... nite nite jie... cya..... waiting for the day i meet u and u bring me out to eat and play and destress.... hug me and sayang me >.< jie... i miss you ..... but i miss her more..... =p nitenite

afternoon Jie

2009-05-20T12:26:00.003+08:00

Good Afternoon To JieJie.... Grats to Me..... i finally changed another dream... but..... it's another dream of ANOTHER PERSON... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz wtf sia... same name.... different pple... >.<>.< zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz tired and sleepy.... but .... no choice lol........... what a dream man... zzzzzzzzzz GOD is my mind clear???i guess no... cos i am having funny dreams now ... lol.. see tonite what dream i got zzzzzzzzzzzz my eyes should be okok.... but these 3 days... i hardly lubricate them =x

oh my oh my.... life is so so so boring lol.... everyday everyone is doing the same things... lol... ya jie... yesterday i typed in personal blog...

Hi.... long time no hear from u but it's ok.... i know u are actually MIAing also??? HAHA.....since that day we were supposed to meet u did nt reply and i know that ya... the answer might be quite straight to me....it's fine with me now... whatever u do , juz take care of yrself and know what u are DOING AND THINKING... although u are happi now... GOOD for u....like u told me u still wanna play... Go and play as much as u like... ^^
i am actually quite happi that u did not remove this..... it might be a way for me to communicate with u... that's so much better then any other forms of communication... Anyway, juz study hard and work ba.. but dun tired yrself...think far of what u do or think, like the consequences, good and bad... etc...... maybe, i did not inherite this much to u...but always remember what u do now will always reflect on what u are few years down the road...so take care of yrself and ENJOY yrself... u might not hear from me for a long long time or maybe never again... it all depends on fate.... see what GOD plans for me ba.... Take care and see ya... ^.^

lol..... zzzzzzzzz i think ..... it's game over.... i dun wanna carry on liao... i am too tried of waiting.... she wan play go play till she happi... i dun care liao.... zzzzzzzzzzzz anyway she is MIAing now... good for her... but she mia in a way where pple can see she is avoiding me.... LMAO.... but i dun care either... about my chess game jie... i will stop it but onli play a bit.... can say... i will get pple to strike and make the attack.... but juz act as a warning???? LOL... see how ba.... i have gained a lot a lot of wisdom and knowledge in these 2 mths... i think i will be a wiser man.... =) good for me ar.... haha.... o.0

^v^

2009-05-20T01:57:00.002+08:00

Nite Jie... Slping like a pig?? LOL...today was a tiring day for me... woke up at 9... went sim lim zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz then reach home around 12+ and fuck i forget to bring my hp out....zzzzzzzzzzzzz then went to see some skates with weekiat and his GIRL... LOl... we went to 2 places and ya... i think i gonna get 1 soon... i wanna relax and have some fun lol... muz pick up my skills back.... then we went to batok and buy something and arrr.... we went imm for dinner as they wanted to buy some things from DAISO(2$ Dollar SHop)... i gtg and i went to RCIA.. and wow ... 1st time i go zzzz then after that i went to weekiat's hse and fetch his girl home and here i am back home... jie.. i took few tests in facebook and ya.. it's quite zhun lol... and i saw an email and quite true ar... >.< i forward u the email ba.. update later... i gtg and do things nitenite jie.. Nitenite to her.... ^.^

nite nite jie

2009-05-19T02:23:00.002+08:00

jie ar jie... dun be angry for what i posted la... zzz but i really dun understand why my dreams are still the same... i already clear of what i wan lo but... GOD like always making me make those dreams zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.... aiyo aiyo.... i dunno la... SOrry jie.....

ya... dad haven slp... and he suddenly told me... dun be sad... juz strive yr career 1st... and u dun need to scare no girls...u las time also got so many girls........ i told him ... how u know... he keep quiet... then i said..u dun always scold me can liao hor.. thanks... LOl he said u in the wrong so i scold u... i said yaya, watever... forget it.. i walk to my room.....to me now... married or nt or whatever.. i dun care... i juz wan to do what i wan... as long as i happi can liao... if i do what i wan, i feel happi and it's bad... i dun care either... LOL.... sorry to have this thinking.. my heart is like the MTV i posted on facebook... KIM... i am beginning to feel like enimem...i know know what it is really like to HATE AND GET REVENGE......i know now is the point where someone is stepping on my tail and not letting it off... it's so painful and hurting ......that's why i am so mad and revengful... sorry jie... i know what i am doing but.... i will forgive onli if GOD hints me or SHE tells me to stop... and i really will.... but i will still torture a bit... or i nt happi... hope u dun mind and i know what i am doing...

i am so so so clear what i wan now... i wan earn lots and lots of money and travel ...i wan to know more pple and widen my network... i wan more wisdom and knowledge.... i wanna be with the one i really love and make a full stop there....i wanan make pple who treat me bad or backstab me suffer... i wan them to know that stepping on my tail or saying bad things behind me will result into bad ending for them.... i wan them to remember me for LIFE.... until i die... i willl still haunt them......it may be hard but i will find ways to do them... to me... nthing is impossible in this world... as long as u really wanna do it... it will always happen....

i took some facebook quiz today.. and ya some of them quite true... ^.^ u read them u sure know if true or not for me LOL... arrr... so sorry jie... 2molo then i post photos.. lol...lazy to post today and 2molo i need to go many places... zzzzzzzzz i wonder why i am getting to know more and more things... will someone know too much things or gain to much wisdom and go crazy ???? i suddenly feel that GOD is giving me quite a lot of talents and i finally realise them now... it might be good for other pple... but to me.... i tend to think and analyze too much of things... omg... why is that so????why does my brain work in a way where i think so much further then normal pple... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz why is it that i am so so so emotional.... zzzzzzzzzzzzz my friends used to say i am like the "weather".... i have bad mood swings... now.. i find i have changed this.... finally.... thank GOD....

Yesterday my friend told me... Life muz go through, pain,suffering,love,happiness,joy,etc.... ya ... it's so true... without all these , there is no life....Life... Life.. Life... zzzzzzzzzz alright jie... i gonna slp... update 2molo and pls pls pls dun be angry about me le ok??? SOrry... T.T
Nitenite Jiejie and ???? Miss you lots and sweet dreams.... ^.^

Omg Omg Omg

2009-05-18T14:22:00.002+08:00

Omg jie... las nite i slp at 5... then i woke up at 8.30-9 to answer a phonecall from my auntie about computer thing... SIAN.... Then i slp till now... 2.25... so so so tired... and i had a dream.............. jia lat... i dream of that IDIOT... omg... we were in a room .... suddenly i took a pencil and jumped onto him and nearly pierced into his face.... and i stopped there.... he keep saying sorry sorry... then all my friends who supported me came into the room and those who were nt involved were forced to left.... he then told me... u will nt get away... i told him... i am well protected by pple here... here got cid, tp,lawyer, goverment pple etc... with high ranking pple... and got hardcore gangsters.... he then shivered and was forced to talk to me.... he keep saying sorry...i told him too bad to u... i remembered i showed him a picture of his mom and dad.... he said sorry i will nt contact her again.. i promise... i will vanish in front of u... he said pls leave them alone... i then showed him pictures of his good buddies.. he then was so scared... i printed his documents and showed him ... and i told him to read them out... he was so suprised i have everything ... -.- then i was about to torture him i remember i brought in 3 huge dogs and told him... u like to fuck right... now let the dog fuck u... he had no choice but to do it... i video the whole process and i told him... if anything happen u will be popular in the world... then my dream stopped... OMGOMG... why am i thinking of these... i dun wanan think of this liao... i was to think of another person... omg omg...

I am so so so so frightened of this dream and so so so tired.... i have lessons later.. zzzz... GOD are u implying to me that my mind is still nt clear??? i know i am clear... but hor.. why ar... why is it like this... this incident keep appearing in my dreams... i dun this to happen.. sigh,....i am so so so frightened and loss again... i knwo that what i do there will be a result... like cause and result... retribution and karma... omg.... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz GOD pls stop these lame dreams for me pls... i wan another type of happi dream with her... nt these... i know my mind might be still very vengeful... sigh......i reallly hope all these will stop....i am going to go crazy..................... i know who i wan and what i wan le GOD... but why ar.... >.<>.<

zzzz

2009-05-18T03:13:00.003+08:00

morning jie... lol.. yesterday nv update so very very tired... yesterday whole day tiring... zzzzzzzz reached home around 1+ then bath etc.,.... yesterday nt much to talk la lol......but i buy 4D 100 TIO EAT... SAD....

Okok... today i buy around 70+ and i tio 100$ LOL... and hor jie.. got 7 numbers all miss by 1 digit... if nt.... Ho seh liao lo... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz but nvm la... slowly.... today i went to develop photos for a friend and went to his shop then time there was so fun ... lol... we joked and laughed so much and i learned so much... i got more wisdom and knowlegde....and i rode bike today after 2 mths... LOL.. the feeling is so so so shiok... i love it... lol.. then hor went for number ball... 5 games i think and i won 2 bucks LOL.....that's so funni.. then we eat and go home and WTF.... my friend call me today ask me wan buy SINGAPORE POOLS football... WTF SIA... if i buy i win .... zzzzzzzzzzz too bad... lol... suan le ba.... slowly slowly hor... my bro came back from thailand today and he got me a very good t-shirt... LOL.. i take photo of it 2molo and post ba... LOL.. really very LMAO... hmmm....

today i noticed something again and got a mysterious call... o.0... pple care for me... and i am very happi... but i will still pray for pple whom are dear and good to me... =) alright i go do my things a while more and slp le jie... nitenite.... ^.^

Ops jie...

2009-05-16T13:52:00.003+08:00

wa jie.. juz finished lunch... and guess how many bowls of rice i eat... LOL.... i eat 5 bowls of rice omg so so so full and i think my appetite is coming back... whahaha.... and ya jie ar... i yesterday got 2 cuts on my thumbs on both hands... SAD SAD MAN.. haiz... poor me hor.... T.T -.-....and ya jie... i rememebred i saw the chinese horoscope about me... and they said i will have lots of "accidents" that will see blood... that includes these cuts -.- zzzz so many times le... these 2 mths my both thumbs injure almost more then 4 times... and hor tey said i will go through a sugery and it really happen... omg omg omg.. hopefully the rest is true also ba... keke......later i goign to buy something for my friend... ^.^ an hourglass... hehe... nice nice hor... i buy le then take pic ba... i going out soon and i am still so so tired.... T.T when i am back i will update u jie.. i think i will be back early 2nite... ^.^.... cya jie... take care.... =p

Wa... Body pain pain

2009-05-16T13:06:00.002+08:00

Afternoon jie... woo.... i finally slp till song song ar.... but hor... my whole body are aching... ar man.... pain pain pain... ya i tell u jie... i had 2 dreams of HER... WTF.... wrong dreams sia....the 1st dream is...i was downstairs her sch... cos i wan too pissed off that she is dragging...when she came down she straight run ...... run to a place... i followed and she run and hugged a guy -.-..................i was more pissed off but then i forgot the dream liao... LOL....2nd dream was....i was out with a girl.... she suddenly appeared to me and WTF... she told me she is hurt... she wans to be 2gether with me again... my answer to her was NO.... i am happi with my current gf now.... and we might be getting married soon... and she told me.... if i do this she will commit sucide... WTF... she is that type of person who will nv ever commit sucide .... but that's in my dreams... maybe it will nt happen... =)

ok... i woke up and 1st thing i do is go down buy 4d... LOL... wa... buy till close to 100 sia... fucking broke now... omg... zzz hope can tio a bit so i can have more xtra money for better plans... =p .... ok jie i update later ba... i now try to do my project a bit....=p .... cya again...

A NEW BEGINNING FOR ME JIEJIE.... ^.^

2009-05-16T03:16:00.003+08:00

Alright... today is my best day of my life...... i woke up in the morning and learned to cook MEE SUA .... today was my 1st time cooking myself... lol... the mee sua comes with abalone, crab meat, meat ball,prawns and chicken....ooooo the soup is delicious... maybe the abalone made them nice... lol... i am trying so so so so hard to cook myself... so nx time at least i can cook for my gf/wife to eat ... lol... at least i know how to cook a bit hor(besides maggie mee)... lmao...

Ok... then i went to work.... imagine... i worked till 2.45... wtf... but between them i was travelling...o.0.... GOD... i think i am enlightened by u.... i hope i can TOUCH her... pls.... hope she knows that i still love her despite time... i forwarded her an email.....it's a pic about a dog with 2 hands and ya.... i send in this message...

???, hope this email brightens your day and enlightened you.Despite losing two "hands", the dog still nv give up... You have lots of strength too...Time can heal those sad and bad memories away...Just forget the past and treat it as a lesson or experience... U might gain more experience or knowledge through them... Although i dun know yr exact problem but i guess it's quite similiar to mine ba...You do not want to talk about it but sometimes saying it out really makes you feel better... It works on me....Despite my experience las few mths... i finally managed to forget and forgive them all... my mind is so clear now... i know who and what i want in life now... maybe it's fated... i always told myself... what i do now will reflect on what i will be 5 yrs later... so u must be as strong as me ok?? Jiayou... you are in my prayers every night you know... ^.^ no matter what, juz remember GOD is with you and will support and guide u....And i will be there for u spiratually to also support you .... ^.^
Alright, sorry for this lenghty message... i am going to join u in dreamland now... haha =p
Sweetest dreams for you everynight.... ^.^
Yours sincerely,
Sam

Am i sweet... lol...i THINK i am loving and missing her day by day.... omg... GOD am i at fault?? is this a test??? is this what u are hinting me???? arrr man.... pls guide me GOD... we are not young now... lol... maybe time can really bring us 2gether..... =)

GOD... i THINK i know now who i really want and what i really need....Can u pls grant this wish for me???I promise i will be a GOOD BOY now... no more notti notti and bad thoughts... i am willing to stop everything.. maybe play 1/100 of my chess..... juz for some revenge lol... but after that i will stop them.....i promise to be a good bf/husband ,friend,son,brother...i will try to be a CLOSE TO PERFECT boi/guy.... pls guide and help me.... Thank you ..... i am saying these deep from my heart....... Pls grant my wish...... ^.^

Ok... it's late....gtg slp liao... update more 2molo....
love u ???? , miss u ???? .see ya in dreamyland..... ^.^

o.0 Jie

2009-05-15T09:32:00.002+08:00

Morning jie.... i have a dream las nite about HER again... but i forgot the dream.... sigh... nvm ba.... i find that she's like MIAing ... but i dun care either... she wanan do wat nt my problem right? i tried to care for her but... she's avoiding or dun care about it.... she did not login msn or facebook for so long... but it's ok... she wanan mia.... maybe the other time i MIA she wanan do the same... but i MIA is for GOOD REASONS example(my dad)..... sigh.... hope she knows what she is doing ba... hope she knows what she really wans and know what she is thinking... she is changing so so much ... mostly from good to bad i guess.... she wans to play now but i hope she will nt step into the fire or circles of traps..... i do not know the reason why she wans to play but i believe it's her surrounding friends that made her like this.... for this i can CONFIRM....sigh....i juz dun bother much... but i juz find that our relationship had made her like this... it's so sad ... i felt that i have made her to become like this or maybe she herself is doing it like this???? i dun know either.....i am not saying what she is doing is wrong but.... she is not like this before... she even deleted her blog... omg.... to me i think... ok lo... u wan do until like this.... i also nt to say.... maybe she attached liao.... but hopefully not... or i will tend to see her true colours..... she will let me have a very very bad impression of her... and fell very disappointed in her.... she told me... before me... she and her ex problem... she said she dun wan history to happen... but i also do hope it will nt happen.... i was there for her when problems came between her and her ex.... is this retribution or karma??? To me she's a very good and intelligent girl... but she dun know how to apply them well... i tot i have made her a better girl when we were 2gether .... but it seems that it's worst... omg... anyway.... juz hope for that day we can meet out for a talk... i dun have much hope of us being 2gether again... but if possible it's good too... but if nt... then i respect her decision... although i am the victim (OVERALL) i will nt persuade the matter much... but my chess will still continue and start.... i wan revenge... i am very bad to think this way but jie i am forced to do it.. ..maybe someone had crossed the wrong path or stepped the wrong tail..... i know u will know what am i implying to.... no matter where u hide or run , as long as it's in SG... i will track,hunt and find u down one day.... i have my ways... GOD granted me with these and i will make full use of them...

sigh... i dunno y... today when i woke up my eyes are so freaking freaking pain... sobsob.... ya i forgot to tell u jie... i went for my eye review and the doctor said..... my eyes are recovering well and good... my left eye is 25 degree and right is 75.... she said dun worry.... cos my eyes are STILL recovering... and she told me to lubricate best hourly... ^.^ i have another review 3 mths later... by then my exams will be over.... ^.^

ooo jiejie... i think i know what and who i really wan liao.... is it fate??? or is it something like pple said... no matter what ... i will be like a big circle and come back to u....what is yrs will be yrs,no matter how u avoid it will still come back to u.... wat nt will nt be yrs no matter how hard to try or do anything... is this a 2nd chance given to me by GOD?? OR is it a test?? or is it a hint????does SHE know it?? i believe yes but.... is it time again?? omg... life is so complicated when love appears in our life... without love wouldn't life be much more perfect??? but without love there will not be kids, or more pple in the world... omg... i am thinking like... -.- i also dunno what i am thinking of.... it's makes me see life like... arrrr.... love....

jiejie... i am so bored o..... so wanna go for a break somewhere ..... sigh.... but i am nt able to.... my reservist is nx mth on the 8th... i have deferred but it was unsuccessful... oh man..... but i reappealed and i am waiting for the answer now... if fail again i will go back to camp and find my officer to fuck him again...i got 1 friend that time defer also cannot he go camp and fuck the officer....LOL... and he got deferred -.- zzzzzzzzzz cos the decision is made by them... and when i was in the army he's very good with us and now he dun understand why we wanan defer????? fucktub officers.... maybe nx time i jio many pple mc 2gether see how they die... LOL....i wanted to go back actually but.... i got sch and work and many other things to do... zzzzz

jie i send u the email few days back u received mah? have u read them??? it's about the friends de... ya... quite the same when i told u 3 yrs back when i was in aus right... lol... friends come in many types...certain friends come and go..... but the email more detail la.. wat seasonal etc.. lol... but my meaning also quite the same right... LMAO... i think i can predict liao... lol.....good for me ba... these type of things i can predict ... other things cannot lol... i wan predict 4D or toto leh.... i wan suck money from goverment... lol... i broke sia... and goverment is always kill us... 7% GST is killing us... my sch fees for degree 16k+ haven + 7% gst= omg man.... still thinking do in sg or overseas..... it all depends on her... ^.^ that her is very special hor... lol... can control me... -.- zzzzzzzzzzzz jie ar jie..... why am i so hard to understand 1... lol.... i dun even understand myself well..... but i admit i did leveled up a bit to understand myself lol...

ok jie... i go rest a while... later 11+ i got things to do...cya jiejie... ^v^

zzzzzzzzzzzzz

2009-05-14T21:55:00.002+08:00

Hey jie... long time no update le ar me... lol .... today was okok day for me la... lol..hmmm... today took some facebook quiz... quite true... see ar....

Quiz 1
Their emotions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They make loyal friends who take the friendship seriously. 6’s should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they cannot.
Quiz 2
you are the most faithfull of them all yet the easiest fooled by partners. You are the type to give your all and have others take advantage of your kindness and generosity...You are the most trusted, and faithfull person.
Quiz 3
You can feel the other peoples need. You are not falling for girls, who are hunting after you. You need your time till you get more seroius with the girl, who fits to you. Time is running and you make your desicions that can change lifes...
Quiz 4
U care about your friend more than yourself..u'll never back off when your friends need you.....and people will always find a true friend in you...
Quiz 5
Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves sports, leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.
Quiz 6
what he/ she z feelingz r true ! and refLectin on his/ her actions ! congradulations!!! make a muve b4 its tooo LAte !! or jus w8 for him/ her to cum 2 you!!!

that's so true lol..... ya jie... las nite i emailed HER and pm her in facebook...

Ya... sorry... 2molo morning i cannot make it.... got to fetch my bro to the airport and then got to work after that... can onli meet u around nite... cos i got lessons around 9+ or 8+.... u can sms me to confirm... thanks..

we were supposed to meet today but after smsing her... no reply... this is how it goes...

SAM= So wat time u can meet me later at nite
JADE=Tonight cannot.. other days ba...
SAM= No.Settle it once and for all
JADE=Huh? Settle what? tonight i try ba...
SAM=Why u cannot.
No reply after this..
SAM= I dun wan our things to drag so long.. Although we broke off... i wanan say things clearly face to face... i wanna see if i should continue waiting for u a not.so we muz meet and talk. it will onli take a few horus of yr time..
No reply again.
SAM=So? U can find time to talk things out? I dun wanan drag it liao.. u were the one who said today. and now u say cannot.. pls try yr best by today... and tell me the time...

She was the one who told me today and now she's avoiding it..maybe she's busy but this is more important then any other things.... i jolly well know the MAIN REASON why she wanan come out and talk also.... it's a prediction but i believe i am correct... not 100% but 99% correct... WTF... i am quite tired of waiting already jie.... i find i am juz a COCKHEAD to juz sit and wait and know so many things... although yes i still love her... but i am afraid my love for her will fade..... i do not wan this to happen... but she's like forcing me to do it indirectly...i know i still love her... but sometimes i am afraid love will become hate... that's not i wan either... i juz wan her to settle it with me once and for all... i wan her to juz tell me... does she still wan me to wait for her? etc.... if yes... i dun mind waiting again.... but.... she muz promise me somethings... i know it's kinda of hard but no choice... LOVE is TRUST....i tend to trust her so so so so so much but..... sigh.... not wanting to talk much about it again... if she finds that i am not suitable for her... she wants to play ... she got another guy who is better then me or watever... she go lo.... she happi nx time or suffer i dun care also.... i juz feel that our 1 yr + relationship is juz a game for her.... NOT TRUTHFUL AT ALL FOR HER... SHE MADE ME TRUST HER AND LOVE HER SO MUCH AND THESE HAPPENS... FUCK IT... u may think i am pushing the blame to her but no.... i am at fault too.... i tend not to show her care and concern much... i plan things and nv told her... but those plans are meant to be suprises.... GOD AR .... why ar... suprises backfire and HEADSHOT ME... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz sigh... dunno wat to say lol...i tend not to plan mroe suprises already... it makes me feel FAILURE... omg... but i am strong... i will nt fall back once and give up... i will do it more ... i will prove it... ^.^

i took some pics again... but not posting them now.. i will onli post them in a mass ba.... Jie ... many pple told me so so so many things again... ya... i got enlightened.... i gained more wisdom.... i am so fortunate to hear these words of wisdom which really made me change and enlightened me...now my main motive is to clear my las term... one step at a time ba.....Busy year for me maybe... Maybe nx mth going redan, sep myammer, oct japan, nov yr place.... arr... travelling... makes me so tired and emo... lol... but i think i will see things and find things to do.... ^.^ i now become so money minded lol.... i've decided to do lesser bad things and do more good things... to accumalate more merits... ^.^

in my prayers there still will be many pple whom are dear to me.... ESP HER...i dunno why but i juz feel that she's still not WAKING UP, LEARNING AND BECOMING MORE MATURE... i find she's getting worst... being more childish ...still avoiding things and etc..... i dunno.. that's what i feel i may be wrong.. i may be right... i am not saying SHE IS 100% what i felt... maybe one fine day she will know what i mean ba.... maybe by that time... i will be away so so so far away or maybe dead by then.... hopefully she stills remember my words back then...nice knowing and seeing pple .... i tend to know who are her GOOD and BAD friends... but i will keep them to myself... she will 1 fine day know them herself, who is good and bad... she tends to be very confident in what she do.... but over-confidence will lead to a fall... i have noticed somethings when we were 2gether... but i dun wanna tell her... cos maybe i respect her and her friends.. but.. till now she still dun realise it... lol.... maybe by the time it's too late for her ba... see how ba... GOD PLEASE PLEASE GUIDE HER..... TEMPORARILY stop guiding me... i know what to do le.... juz focus on her ba...although ya... i have bad thoughs... but i am willing to accept the punishements.. be it retribution or karma... it's the path i choose... i keep saying she's forcing me to do it... but it's juz a phrase to defend myself... whatever it is ... i give up now... i am willing to accept those myself... alright jie.. i currently stop here 1st... i got to do my work 1st... and 2molo will be a long and tiring day for me... arrrr..... >.< jiayou ^.^

Hey jie

2009-05-13T01:00:00.003+08:00

jie ar.... yesterday so many things happened... lol... i tell u on the phone ba other days..but got 2 things i asked HER... u stil love me?? No... We still got chance 2gether??? No...LMAO.... i know the reason why lo.... but nvm 1st.... my game of chess will start soon... i will be EVIL... i will be BAD... i dun care how pple see me but too bad... i am forced into this..... i will slowly play this game of chess.... i am well prepared liao.... onli when to start.... lol... ok dun wan say liao.... say le more dulan and hot...say liao my blood will boil... and i will tend to wanan kill pple... LOL... serious as in really kill and torture.... dun worry la... juz angry but will nt do .... always remember wat i said jie... i juz open my GOLDEN MOUTH LOL.............. there will be world war 10 soon... this 10 is created by me....juz let's start the ball rolling.... o.0

today was o.0 day... i completed the pricelist for my customer yes... but onli 1/3... still got 2 more nt done... lmao... then hor... i go meet a friend for dinner.... then i went to find a place...heng ar... find a while can find liao lmao..... oooo... good good... then after that go eat eat and walk walk a while and go home liao... these 2 days i like dun feel like typing... lol... fingers are too tired lmao.... i tell u on the phone ba... so tired now... 2molo still got review zzzzzz 2molo then i update more ok??? nitenite jiejie... miss ya ..... miss elmo too.... ><

WAKE UP JIE!!!

2009-05-12T03:31:00.001+08:00

Wake up wake up jie... faster... now 3.30 liao... yr side 5.30.... i 2molo morning 8.30 appointment leh... u haven wake up wtf..................................dun be a pig liao jie.... faster wake up..... i solve yr com problem 1st zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz then at least i can slp a while zzzz

Pictures o....

2009-05-11T19:46:00.008+08:00

I love this pic too..... at least i tried to smile hor..... LOL... better room for improvement.... DO i look handsome in this attire rather then my old usual way of wearing clothes??? LOL.... Jie can comment or advice.... =p

FUCKING TRAFFIC LIGHT SO LONG 1......

This side a bit UGLY.... LOL

Off to work.... i quite love this pic....

This car same plate number as my bike... LOL

GOD IS BEHIND ME SUPPORTING ME ALWAYS... =)

Side view looks more boiboi hor me.... LOL

After bath pic... SEE THE HAIR SO SUXS................

I am Blaming GOD.... GOd ar... why ar?????? >.<

Do i look like a businessman??? LMAO.... not in this attire...

Caught slping in the car by someone.... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I am so Emo... still dunno how to smile during picture taking LOL.....

I find my face is shaper now... siao liao... i need to be fat!!!

These are what we got yesterday again =x

This Is Family Photo.... See the Baby stitch ... so huge.... like ELMO FAT BOI NOW... LOL.....

This is the couple stitch we got...............

Minnie and Me!! =)

This is the Hourglass which i hunted for such a long time... Nice hor jie???

Say GoodBye To my Loving specs since army...

Hey Jie

2009-05-11T19:39:00.003+08:00

Hihi jiejie, today i nv go sch LOL... pon ar... so tired and bored so nv go lo... lol... dun scold me ar ... zzzzzz ... today after customer's hse... i came back and rushed their laptops... juz completed 2 of them... ^.^..... ya.... juz now today dad came back... sudennly talk to me sia... so nice..... lol cos i cooking maggie i super super hungry so muz eat or gastric again... =( he said why nv call tell me i buy for u la... LOL...then he asked about HER.... i say both of us busy zzzzz he said, I THINK I SAW HER LAS WEEK... SHE WAS WITH A GUY.... ASK ME IF I KNOW THE GUY... I SAY DUNNO BUT HE SURE DIE... LOl... DAD asked , u 2 quarrel??? i said no... LMAO... then he said.... if u need help or wat juz tell me LOL.... WTF WTF WTF.... I SHOULD FUCKING RECORD WHAT HE SAID.... AND I WILL TIO TOTO AND 4D FOR THE WHOLE MONTH.... LOL...even i tell my friend he also dun believe LMAO.... ya my bro said he thurs going thailand till sunday... FUCKING SAD... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

okok i update some pics 1st ... u so long nv see me le hor jie... LOL....

FUCK IT MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-05-11T11:30:00.002+08:00

jie ar jie .... FUCK SIA.... juz now hor i typed so so long then i forgot and restart my com... FUCK IT MAN.... ya... i try to remember what i type... i woke up yesterday i think 6+ a while then i went back to slp.... so so so so so tired..... ya... i woke up at 10.50 like this.... then i found my old songs..... so so so so so many nice nice de.... and sad sad de songs -.- zzzzzzzzzz example......Jeff Chang - 从开始到现在 or Amazing by george michael.... but hor ... SUA LA... LOL..... i need to be happier ^^ i today wake up dunno y... like got many plans i muz do.... lol.... cannot tell u wat =p..... then hor.... yesterday mom asked me about HER 3 times... i said... we busy work and study so she hardly come.... oooooo...mom misses her i guess..... when can i tell her the truth?? when can i tell her, mom we are gone.... she dun like yr son... yr son suxs... if i say like this she sure KILL OR SCOLD ME ONE... ZZZZZZZZZ.....LOL... u wan grandchildren ask justin la... LMAO... if nt i will tell her... ya we will get married soon... ^^.... byebye... we gonna stay 2gether but nt with u all LMAO... 2 of us nia.... see how la.... lmao... to me now marry or not no effect.... wat i wan now is $$$$, FAME, POWER.... LOL....when i die , i wan pple to remember me... ^.^..... think i need to rush out a book which i wanted to publish .... but currently a bit no time to do.... work is already KILLING ME to the max.... WORK IS DRAINING MY ENEGRY.....

Arrrr man... gonna rain soon... and today i no CAR.... cos dad gonna fetch charlene,auntie Christina's daughter....oooooo think i gonna bike to customer's hse.... FUCKING 4 coms to do... zzzzz i think i am PRO..... i always settle problems fast... sometimes less then 5 mins... LOL.. Am i talented or lucky ... lmao... i also dunno..... ya ya ya..... 2molo morning muz wake up so early zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.... tonite got class.........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i guess tonite dinner = mac.... NONO cannot... every monday science center de mac close at 7PM..... fucking early zzzz....see how ... see wanna eat wat la... maybe JIAN FEI.... LMAO....

i decided liao... from today onwards... i gonna totally change myself.... i wanna be a new new new samsam..... yesterday when pple saw my pic on my laptop.... pple cannot recognise me ...... pple say totally different... pple say handsome... lol.... =x .... Ya... i gonna make myself very very handsome , smart and rich now.... i gonna DO IT... and i gonna change... make pple notice me.... make pple see .... i can do it... LOL.... maybe dreaming but i think can la... i got so many supporters.....

omg jiejie... gonna strat rain liao... i was trying to sing a song AMAZING for so so long... ya... i got it now.. i think should be quite ok ba.... LOL.... but hor... u still cann listen... =x

The lyrcs by George Michael=AMAZING

I was mixed up when you came to me ,Too broke to fix Said 'daddy get you gone,
I'm missing my baby' Still missing my baby
I was stitched up by the hands of fate ,Said how you gonna make it on your own
If luck is a lady? Maybe luck is a lady

I was going down for the third time ,My heart was broken,
I was not open to your suggestions I had so many questions ,That you just kissed away

Tell me, I guess that cupid was in disguise, The day you walked in and changed my life
I think it's amazing, The way that love can set you free
So now I walk in the midday sun ,I never thought that my saviour would come
I think it's amazing ,I think it's amazing, I think you are amazing

You tried to save me from myself ,Said 'Darling, kiss as many as you want!
My love's still available ,And I know you're insatiable'
We're like victims of the same disease ,Look at your Big Bad Daddy, and your mom
And your mom...was always acting crazy

I was going down for the third time, My heart was broken,
I thought that loving you was out of the question ,
Then I saw my reflection Saying please don't let this go

Tell me, I guess that cupid was in disguise The day you walked in and changed my life I think it's amazing, The way that love can set you free So now I walk in the midday sun I never thought that my saviour would come I think it's amazing I think you're amazing ...

OMGOMG JIE... i juz saw an accident outside when i was smoking... so so loud and BANG... WTF.... GOD PLS BLESS THEM.... omg omg.... hopefully no one is hurt... pls... >.< i am the witness of it... -.- i know who's wrong and right.... lol... ok jie i go 1st be back later.. =p late liao

Nitenite jie

2009-05-11T03:31:00.002+08:00

GOOD MORNING JIE!!! LOL.... it's 3.30am at sg now -.- zzzz i juz finished my bath after completing 20% of a customer's job zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..... i very hardworking hor .... lol...................jie ar jie... today was a zzz day... i went to work and my bro sms me DINNER 2gether??? i said ok lo... then i sms all MOTHERS in my phone.... then mom called me and i was in the lift around 6.... then we went to imm to eat long beach.... end up i pay zzzzzzzzzzzz..... and the food i nv eat much... cos mostly seafood... WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cab, prawns etc... all cannot cos of lasik zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz during the whole dinner.... i nv talk more than 5 sentences... LOL... then i went home and was bored.... mom and dad quarelled again zzzzz..... aiya dunno wat la... i hear le dulan go out.... so i went to meet a friend "Yilin" .... dun worry jie , i treat her juz like my little sis... ^.^ we went occ and play billard....

OMG GUESS WAT JIE.... 2nd 1 dollar coin.... i got the BABY STITCH... LMAO.... then i was addicted and omfg... today i got 3 Bears... LOL.... lucky lucky hor lmao.... but yilin wanted one so she got it... LOl... then i though .... the baby stitch was bigger then mom and dad.... and i tot... ya hor... elmo now is bigger and fatter.... LMAO... funni me right -.- zzzz but a bit true also lol.... then fetched yiling back and now do my work........... i did till now lo.... i am so so so so so tired.... tuesday morning full body checkup.... wednesday lasik checkup.... BORING.... after this lasik check up better.... i think hor i am more free.... jie... i miss elmo so so so much.... wondering how is he now.... is he still notti?? is he still giving mummy problem??? hope not.... =) as for missing her no need to say much... u know the answer lo.....LOL..... and of course i miss u jie... LOL... -.- .....Mother's day -.- ....................... i think there should be BACHELORs DAY LOL.... that's very random... -.- i guess i am too tired... dunno wat to write and what i am thinking now... waiting for my hair to dry.... almost le.... guess wat jie.... it's 3.45 now... i think hor... i go and slp 1st... 2molo i need to repair 4 computers zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
BORING....

2molo then i update jie... nitenite and sweet dreams.... nitenite and sweetest dreams to minnie... miss u lots lots too minnie.... ^.^ see u in dreamland again LOL... nitezzzzzzzzzzzzz

Happy Mother's Day ^.^

2009-05-10T10:41:00.001+08:00

Good morning jie... juz woke up.... zzzzzzzzzzz................las i woke up again at 6 yesterday -.- zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and hor....i had a dream of she n me again WTF!!!! omg omg omg.... she keeps appearing in my dreams.... >.< dunno is good or bad lol....... it's a dream of going overseas ..... going to find u jie, and to japan.... we so enjoy .... -.- lol... we went 2 places for 2weeks each and travelled around so so so many places.... wa.... how i wish it really happens... lol..... can see so many things and plan so many things 2gether with her ... ^.^ watever it is let's see ba..... see what GOD plans for me and her....

ya jie... i downloaded the program structure for my degree and masters liao... 2nite then i send u u see for me and find sch.... so far i heard onli 2 uni in the world offer my degree and 1 uni onli offers the masters.... my course is IT DEGREE IN (Networking,Security). these 2 are the majors....xie xie ^.^

ya my eyes are getting clearer and clearer day by day i think... nt sure lol... see wednesday the review wat the doctor says.... when i wake up today mom scolded me dunno for fuck... then i super attitude her back she keep quiet... WTF MAN... early mornign wan niam me and i dunno wat she saying.... i am too tired and stone....anyway HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MOM!!! ^.^Sry cannot accompany u today... gtg out work, do things.....zzzzzzzzz ho ho ho.... i gtg liao jie..... update 2nite ok?? =) miss u jiejie.... MISS U LOTS LOTS minnie mouse ^.^

o.0

2009-05-10T03:02:00.000+08:00

zzzzzzzzzz jie... i juz finished work again at home.... SAD MAN.... and i haven bath... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz today hor... i go work... i propose de sample... so so so many mistakes lol.... maybe my chinese suxs... -.-that's why i redo it again 2nite.... then hor... after that i go slack slack a while.... then at nite meet friend go OCC (Yishun) play pool.... and hor... pool is boring and suxs... -.- but no choice no one wanna play snooker... zzzzzzzzz then hor that time my friend help me HOOK 1 STITCH(DISNEY character) out... it's a male... i think 1 mth + ago... and i always think that male is me... so lonely wor.... everyday i drive see him in the car reminds me of myself.... -.- zzzzz then after everything.... i wanna HOOK the female STITCH out... so can have a couple mah.... i got stupid thinking... if i hook her out= Minnie will come back to ME LOL.... wtf man... end up i changed 6$ one dollar coins... and i aim zhun zhun... 1st coin i tio LIAO.... LMAO... 1 dollar for 1 coin.... previously i think 3 pple spend almost 50+ to get that female STITCH... everyone is trying to get a cuple for me..... and today so so heng... i get it with 1 try alone...maybe i told GOD pls... i really wanna HOOK it from the bottom of my heart and yes 1 arrow 1 hit into the bullseye.... LOL... so i went to the car and took pic of it... i am so so so so happi.... Heehee.. other day then i post the remaining pics ba.... i find hor... i am getting really older and older... -.- .... hopefully more handsome and more like a man...can attract more girls mah??? LOL... jus kidding... no intrest too... maybe can attract them and sell them my SOAP and KEYCHAINS or NORTON..... LOL...... haha.....

ya... yesterday de dream hor... i think that i am willing to sacrifice anything for her man... omg... GOD ... that's in my dreams means it show my personality.... WHY AM I SO GOOD TO HER..... WHY...... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Is it cos i still love her?? my friends asked me, do u still love her????? i dunno.... maybe yes , maybe no... then the dream so happen to appear las nite... i think now the answer is YES... if pple ask me do u stil love her again... i will say YES I STILL LOVE HER, I AM WILLING TO SACRIFICE ANYTHING FOR HER AND I SERIOUSLY STILL LOVE HER...I CAN FORGIVE WHAT SHE HAS DONE BEFORE AND FORGET....FOR LOVE I CAN DO IT..... true ar....seriously speaking for the past few weeks... i tend to have the feelings that i am so so disappointed in her... i tend to wanna give up on waiting.... i am beginning to hate her instead of loving her....i dun understand what she is thinking of right now... she says she is happi right now... but is she really happi??Is it a short period of happiness for her NOW?? does she know what she is doing???? does she know that what she is doing now will reflect on herself 5 yrs later or in the future???Does she know that there will be a cause for everything to happen????Is she avoiding things???? Is she hiding something??? Did she really sit down and think what she have been doing or what she really wants???? she says she wanna study hard and work hard... but did she do them all???? is this the kind of happiness she ONLY wans??? all i dunno.... maybe GOD can answer me in future.... but something or someone is always beside me whispering to my ears telling me... u still love her dun u.... why are u having hate instead of love... u jolly well know u love her... u are willing to even sacrifice anything for her.... not to mention to forgive or forget........at least everyday she still comes to yr thoughts whenever u are happi...u wished she was here to share this kind of hapiness with u.... u wished she was here to see what u are doing or thinking.... like u said u are hard to understand... she did told u u are easy to understand... but till now does she really understand me???? i dun think so... i have so many plans i have planned and done... but it's useless now... maybe it will be useful if miracles happens.....u still say u dun love her?? u love her SAM.... u planned for u and her future 2gether.... u made her study... u planned to let her meet Marie Jie end of this yr and to see the house u saw along the beach few yrs back... U planned to bring her to japan, not onli to have a holiday but see the house u intend to buy in future if u migrate there... u planned so so many things.... u taught her things about life and experiences.... u shared with her... and u say u DUN LOVE HER???? U DO LOVE HER AND U STILL LOVE HER... IF NOT, WHY DOES SHE ALWAYS COME TO YOUR MIND WHEN U ARE HAPPI? U ARE JUST WONDERING AND HOPING IF SHE WAS HERE NOW, 2 OF U WILL BE HAPPIER 2GETHER...

anyway jie... enough of these liao... later i sobsob again... LOL... dun worry la... will nt -.- ....ok it's so so late le jie... i 2molo need to wake up at 10am... zzzz i update 2molo again ba... tomolo i got a long long day.... same update at nite or 2molo morning if possible...nitenite jie... it's gonna rain heavily now... nitenite... miss you ..... miss Minnie too..... muacks muacks.... ^.^

Tired ar jie.... >.<

2009-05-09T10:56:00.002+08:00

Morning jie... i juz woke up and yes... las nite after i post till now.... i nv wake up finaly............... but i had a nightmare... i dream of one very very impossible thing... zzzz.... i dreamt of that IDIOT call n say she's at the hospital.... then i rushed there.... that idiot was scared of me.... -.- then she had a kidney problem and doctor said she needs one... so i told the doc am i qualified , the doc said yes and ya we went for the sugery .... after that... everything is successful and fine.... i was on the bed and too tired and weak.... T.T i juz hope that everything is good for her... and then that idiot talked to me to apalogize etc... i told him it's no use... i will still haunt u.... u will still suffer.... zzzz after that a few mths later... she recovered and find me... i am still in the hospital cos too weak... and i was like... ya u are recovering i am happi and then i told her... i am very tired pls leave the room..... T.T jie does it mean i am not able to forgive her??? does it mean i dun love her already??? i am in a mess........ but no matter what it's juz a dream.... sigh....i am so so so tired and have a very very bad headache when i woke up... ya... mom's operation is successful too... thank GOD... i am juz too tired and sleepy now but i still got to type this , if nt i will forget it... then hor i need to go work again...........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz so so so tiring ...................... guess it's what life is all about... i always said... everyone is born to wait and die... we do the same things.... study.. work..and die.... if nt.... study ... work..... date... marry.... die.... lol... also same logic... we survive to earn money and spend and die..........zzzzzzzzzzz why why why so funni 1 lol....................whatever it is... i juz hope she's fine.... and know what she is doing .... i will pray everyday to make her clever, smart and know what is right and wrong... maybe GOD can help me by guiding her....GOD pls help to answer my prayers ....i believe i still love her ..... and god.... pls give me the strength to love her more and make my love stronger... i am getting weaker and weaker as days goes by.... i think it's maybe time that's playing a part.... GOD... pls help us... help everyone in this world who needs help.... help her family members, mine too and pple around us..... i know u are great and wonderful GOD.... pls Help us.... thank you GOD.... ok jie... i think i gonna bath and change and off to work i go again............ -.- tired.... >.< tonite then i update... i think i wanan go out today.... so long nv go out... always work work work... zzzz see where then i go ba... cya jie... free DUN SMS me... cALL me cheaper... LOL... miss ya..... miss MINNIE too.... ^.^

Most GOod DAY FOR WORK and TIRING DAY...

2009-05-09T01:34:00.004+08:00

Morning jie... lol i think u slping liao... u went beach with peipei right... LOL... i wan new photos to see... >.< i wan see u fat or thin.... lol.... okok....

Today met mr tham at 8.30am.. had breakfast... tham treated me breakfast... ^.^ and we chatted for so many things.. about work la... bout that problem la... -.- ..... then we went to shenton way... to relocate the new location and set up their network,server and ip phones...
we went to collect those stuff and WTF see these SHALOM MOVERS.... they got so so many things to move and block our way and waste our time... and the fucking guard at the building wasting time and the lift is the worst......... wait 1 lift can wait 5 mins... zzzzzzzzzzzz then we headed to another site also at shenton way.... then got 1 car... keep look at me... so i stared at him... end up same car park and he and his girl i think they are in their 40+.... come out i keep stare at the guy cos i bad mood... he keep look... i look all the way and he also like this... LMAO... not happi come lo.... drive 1 fucking honda stream nia....then we went finished around 2... we had our lunch and tham asked me about my carrer la... after my course wat i wan... i said degree le masters.... LOL... he said then wat u wanan do ... i say take cert for the sake of mom and myself... like i wan fame so i need paper too... then he syco me join his company -.- work as IT INFRASTRUCTURE... i told him my networking is ok, sever okok... but nt very confident... he say can learn mah.... i said i consider ba... then june actually need to go indonesia but he said maybe postpone but most probably confirm.... then i left and went to meet a friend.... i am teaching him how to repair com and help him in his business... then we headed to another friend's hse to pass something to her... then we chatted and the chat was around 1hr.... talked so many things and i found out that SHE is really changing from GOOD TO BAD... even pple around her also say that and notice that...it totally disappoint me........at least las time pple say she's getting better... now she's worst... sigh... GOD... pple tend to change fast... but it is a bad sign for her maybe.... it's up to her to notice it but i dun think she knows... she's happi wat... LOL... it's her life.... she suffer or watever i also dunno la..... i tried my best to change her liao GOD... dun blame me thanks... ^.^ then we headed to the customer's hse and ya repaired her com and her daughter so happi when her com works... ^.^ then my friend sold her something and ya... earn a bit money and maybe can pull her in too.... LOL... success ar.... i always have far far plans.... ^.^

Then we headed to a friend's shop and ya... he needs our help to help to use com and create a pricelist for him... willingly i will do it.... =) then my friend got to work and i fetched him there cos nearby.... then i went back the shop to see if i can help more... and ya.... i stayed there till 7.45 -.-... i have lessons... after everything... i left for class... i am so freaking hungry.... then my teacher kiwi and jet wee said... wa... 1st time see u wear so nice and handsome... LOL.. wtf... cos i wear shirt and pants mah... and hor i got take some pics.... onli that my hair dun match or sure power power 1 lol...... =x then break time we went mac to eat... so fucking hungry....... after that go back class..... and after class fetch my friends home....

Reach home le..... nv bath ... so tired.... but need to complete the job... OMFG... it's all in chinese and my chinese freaking suxs.... i finished them all around 1.30... then i went to bath... and now i am typing this for jie to see.... dun wan make her worry.... actually i wan slp liao.... so tired lol...

Jie ar jie... i tend to be more "DU" in watever i do now sia... -.- omg... i wan things to be done FAST, PERFECT! no 2nd time....jialat... like too rush and overconfident... -.- but i know what can be done in that way ... dun worry... i can now see very very very far liao... like special eyes... lol... onli in SOMETHINGS still NOOB... even near also cannot see LMAO....i am juz so disappointed in her.... SUPER REALLY DISAPPOINTED... WATEVER IT IS GOD PLS HELP AND GUIDE HER... WAKE HER UP PLS.... SHE IS ALREADY 20 NOT 16... instead of being MATURE.... SHE's BEING CHILDISH, STUPID , IGNORANT, AVOIDING PROBLEMS., PUSHING THEM ASIDE... dunno wat to say la... dun wan talk so much also... talk le heart pain pain..... i tot when i am with her i changed her alot... many pple can tell and judge also... but now... many pple can tell and judge also that she changed so so so much... so so so much worst (TO ME) u ask me i can name them all for u to hear jie.... NX time free i tell u 1 by 1... but hor u muz be in sg or i muz be in aus... or my hp bill will -.- .... unless u wan pay for me LOL... jk =x

ok la jie... i very tired le... anything i miss out or wat i will update u 2molo ok??? =p... miss u lots jie... miss u lots MINNIE... nitenite and sweet dreams.... ^.^ c'',)

So So Tired~~~~~~~

2009-05-08T07:49:00.003+08:00

Good morning jie... lol.... i gonna leave home for a long tiring work day liao ...zzzzz i read the news juz now... WOOO..... mas selemat is caputred... LMAO... i find 1 phrase very good... by PM lee hsien loong....he quoted," He is one up on us, but the game is not over, One day we will catch him." LOL... 1 Fine day i will catch those pple who mistreat and badmouth me or let me down... LOL... 1 fine day... and it will always happen... like i said... what u do now will come to light in future... onli a matter of time... so pple out there... pls be smart of what u do and think... it will reflect on what u will be 5 yrs down the road... dun think u can hide now and escape it.... some pple tend to hide things from me... but die die i know them... LOL... fuck it sia... zzzz make me more pissed off nia... -.- but nvm bout it... let time decides and let time show me what i should do....

i woke up juz now and mom told me she's going for another operation.... WTF... always operation and i dunno... LOL... i dunno what's wrong also and maybe i did not care but about home... But at least she told me... May GOD bless her..... las nite b4 i slp... i prayed for so many things again... i prayed for the world, for my jiejies,bros, and all whom are close and family to me.... i prayed for MINNIE, her sister,bro in law, the 2 kids, mom and dad, her grandparents and not to forget elmo.... hope they are doing fine and no obstacles will make them feel weak or discouraged... ^.^.... lastly i prayed for myself... i told GOD... u have given me hints and make me really plan for what i really wan now.... thanks.... but u muz also help me and guide me along the way.... whether good or bad... i wil still bear the concequences.... sorry GOD... that's the choice i make already..... u juz need to hint me more and help me... thanks.... ^.^ all these tests, hints, etc give by u are so so so tricky.... i scare i take the wrong step and GOOD GAME for me.... zzz but no matter what i will bear them.... be it retribution or karma.... i believe what i am going through now is part of my retribution and karma.... and mostly TEST by u... i dunno y but that is juz a strong feeling for me... hope we are able to overcome this Tricky and Tough TEST.... hope u bless and guide us GOD...

OMG... it's 8 i gtg liao jie... i will update later... if i have the time... hopefully i can finish earlier and go home and have some rest... my eyes are like a bit better... and i think i am still a bit sick... FUCK SIA... i dun like to be sick... no one likes... but it die die come back to me.... ARRRRR MAN...... cya jie, hope u have a wonderful day ahead and to pple out there... be happi and enjoy yr day.... but ALWAYS REMEMBER if u are happy TODAY , does not mean u will be everyday.... life is full or traps and obstacles.... 1 wrong move= LOL.... so remember pple... ^.^
cya jie.... ^.^

Nitenite jiejie....

2009-05-07T22:47:00.002+08:00

Jie... end up i went sch lol... i fetched a friend (AUNG)from cck then we went to mac to eat opp our sch... guess wat.. i upsize a fillet meal and ordered 6 pieces nuggets... and i finished them all... even the fries i also finish all .......haha... then another friend(LIM) came... 3 of us eat and talked... they asked about my problem... i hear liao = -.-zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz then i told them what i was thinking and planning to do... they say... DUN... lol... see how la.... see how it goes.... they are like giving me hints...the say the next step i do is very critical... they ask me to think if i still love her a not... i think think think.... yes i love her... but... dunno la... lol.........my mind still in a mess... liek the puzzles are nt fixed yet.... GOD did u send them to tell me these???? are they hints????if yes... ok... i will relax 1st... and i hope time can prove everything and do it well..... i hope time can let her know that i realy love and cherish our relationship......thanks GOD.....my friend send me an emaill... it's so relaxing and true... are they hints from u too GOD??? ya... i forwarded to many CLOSER friends... thanks GOD... ^.^

then we went for lessons.... today lesson was so boring... zzzzzzzzz but not bad... got some tips for project LOl.... then after lessons... my teacher and friends COMBINE AND DISTURB ME.... WTF SIA.... all of them married onli me... and all say i dun wan marry meh? etc.... say till i also dulan and dunno wat to reply... LOL... 1st time i speachless... -.- i really super speechless lo.... dunno wat to say also... zzzz .... ya jie u got friend who is certified nurse in any hospital mah??? in any country... if got ask them wanan study honors mah??? BSG and sch in UK.....course fees are around 22k.... and it's a genuine one......i got good offer for it and can get money de... lol.. we can share... ^.^ got muz tell or intro me hor... xiexie jiejie...i ask my teacher about teaching industry he say no good zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

about the marry thing... they keep asking... u 27 liao.... not bad looking, stable job, got money, got this got that... my good points la... WHY MAI MARRY.... WTF..... KEEP DISTURB ME THOSE FUCKERS..... they know my problem except my teacher and still keep suan me.... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzz.... they keep saying me till i say.... i go out smoke u all enjoy here.... and wtf... they all come out and continue.........zzzzzzzzzzzzzz the DISTURBANCE LASTED FOR AROUND 40 mins... WTF MAN..... i am going CRAZY LOL........to me now hor... marry is like ai mai liao..... wanan marry can.... onli marry her....no more others... dun wan marry after that liao.... no more nx girl= no more marry.... 100% ..... i rather bachelor.... LOL... bachelor also not bad ar..... hahahahha..... unless u intro me more girls.... excluding peipei... lol... i scare of her ar....i also dunno why... that time u tell me she like me.... i scare sia................... -.- and now i liek this she so concern i more scare.... but i know she cares as a friend.... hope my guess is correct LOL..... =) and dun tell her pls...... ahahahahhahaha....... secret between u and me...... =p but intro is intro.... no more next step for me .... trust me... juz as normal friends nia lo... haha... widen my network= more money LOL..... good plans i got ar....now i wan aim earn more and more money.... to do good or bad also can... lol.... dun worry jie.... ^.^

ya... i think sep before my bday i will go myammer, oct japan and aus.... or nov then aus.... i wan go find ideas and find network... i wanna MAKE IT BIG... i wan pple to know me... i wan POWER, FAME... i wan so much things now... LOL... greedy and ambitious... but dun worry i wil nt over do it and over confident or will lead me to a fall.... ^.^... i got limit 1 jie... relax..i will tend to remember those who treat me good and those who are not... those who are will benefit and i will always remember them.... =) those who are not will tend to SUFFER and i will slowly torture them..... no matter how many pple there is and how long it takes... i will always remember them and make them suffer slowly.... UNTIL I DIE then it stops... LOL....jiejie =x ^.^

Not bad ar... after this i got much more plans ..... but maybe i think too far... jie ar... remember that time we went the beach at melbourne???? there got 1 stretch of pubs, shops etc,.... above got some house right.... i intend to get 1 there and stay for life maybe in future.... or maybe in japan, tokyo..... i already know the exact locations when i will live in future... but u think is it worth it or correct mah???? i dunno... pls give me some advice......pple still tell me sg is better but hor... sg is onli a 2.5 scale in terms of technology... japan is already reaching to the 5th scale.... for aus is around 3..... although technology in sg is fast as we though... it's still slow... -.-
hmmmmm.....

alright ... 2molo will not be able to blog from morning till nite... i have an appointment at 8.30,10,afternoon 2 places to go... nite class, after class maybe 1 more... 2molo will be a freaking tiring day for me and i need to wear FORMAL... WTF.....zzzzzzzzzzzz the attire i hate most LOL...... oh man.......................... but if i go all and + this week's job i go for all... i think got close to 1k or more.... LOL... so it's quite worth for me ... although tiring... i need to buy so many things.... need to do so many things..... i feel like buying a TAG HEUER watch...i aim very long but haven see the one that i like...zzzzzzzzzz..... Jie wan buy for me as bday present mah??? LOL... maybe yr side sells cheaper =x... jk.. HAHAH....... i need to laser off my tattoo... i need to get a lucky abascus necklace for myself.... i need to get new clothes, shoes etc.....i need so so many things and all need $$$$$$$...... STUPID $$$$$$$$ make us work like DOG... lol...i also intend to rent a flat to stay alone.... the smaller the better, cos the smaller the cheaper.... lol... i wanna lead an independent life .... i wanna prove to MY DAD that i can do it MYSELF... i wanna prove to PPLE i can do it myself... I wanna prove to so so so many pple that me, SAM can do it HIMSELF without anyone's help.... so i need to JIAYOU!!!!!!!! i feel like i am WAKING UP liao... lol... cannot slp so much like las time... i think i wasted almost half of my years slping... now it's time i need to wake up and do things... get things done right and correctly .... hopefully smoothly and GOD and good friends, bros and sis, helps and encourages and guide me along this path.... not to forget Minnie if we r still 2gether....

Ok jiejie, i juz finished a bath and it's 12am now... 1 more stick of cigarette and off to slp... 2molo long day... -.-
kk jie.... Nite nite and sweet dreams... sweet dreams to everyone who treats me good... ^.^ bad dreams and bad luck to those who are FUCKERS OR 'MASK' PPLE OR WATEVER... sweet dreams to minnie too... ^.^

Afternoon Jie~

2009-05-07T17:37:00.002+08:00

Today was a super tiring day..... i dunno y... i think gonna fall sick again.......zzzzzzzzzzzzzz las nite i slp so early but i woke up half hr later and i tot i slp for a very long time... zzz then i woke up at 4+ again... Wtf.............. jie i think pple say my heart not at ease so i tend to be like this..........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz FUCK MAN ... i wanna slp long long.... then i went to habourfront to fix an internet issue.... it suxs.... it took me 15 mins to finish it... LOL... so easy -.-zzzzzz then after that ..... i went to meet mr tham to get something for 2molo's onsite.... zzzzz after that... i went to have lunch with a friend.... WTF ... MY HONGKONG CAFE IS CLOSED!!!!!!!!!!!zzzz so we eat duck store... and the duck store SUXS!!!!!!!FREAKING not nice to eat.....after that ... i went home to get my eye drop... today is the LAS DAY I CAN USE IT!!!! die die muz use more... LOL.....then wanna go home... my friend said.. let's BILLARD.......zzzzzzzzzzzz we played 3 games and was bored.... we play 5 games of pool and was bored too... i feel i am gonna fall sick... i have a very bad headache now and i have lessons later..... i dunno wanna go a nt... and i am so sleepy............ >.< i think 90% gonna fall sick again lo........zzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh ar....why this yr always fall sick.... why this year so bad for me.... FUCKING 2009!!!!GO FUCK SPIDER BETTER.... heng now MAY gonna half of it le... faster ar.....i got so much plans ..... i am going to do them all as planned.... ^.^... ya jie... i am intending to get my MASTERS after my DEGREE... i decided liao... DIE DIE muz get it... as for the teaching stuff.... maybe i will go into it... but i need to call and ask my cousin about it... see hard a not.... lol.... maybe i also cannot qualify for it... see how ba...

ok jiejie... i go have a rest and see how ... if i go sch then go lo.... if nv i think i will visit my dreamland ..... =x update later again ok?? =p

FUCKTARD TIRING~

2009-05-07T00:08:00.002+08:00

Such a tiring day jie... i went to bendemeer for onsite.. and yes... guess wat.... i managed to solve a problem that they cannot solve for many mths.. YEAH!!! i think i gonna get xtra money for that from mr tham... woots....i finished around 5+ today.. so early.. cos i completed checking all the stuff... after that i went to a friend's place.... he wanted to buy printer.. so i acc him go... then went to fetch his "GIRL" whom he loves at SSDC... LMAO... i go ssdc is so LOL... the las time i went there was 6 yrs ago.. ya.. SSDC is a driving center ...after that we headed to his hse... he made food for us.. we ate 2gether and i slacked till around 10+ the GIRL went back by cab... then went to play some pool and went home.. so tired....

Ya.. by seeing the girl for the 1st time, i find her impression is BAD.. no manners, she is like juz coming cos she's ASKED to come? she's putting on a mask... she's hinting somethings for example going home, do we wanna fetch her back etc.. SO MY ADVISE IS NO... she's not his type... she's juz making use of him.. LOL.. i become a bit pro hor.. LOL.. maybe BY seeing pple's character all these i very zhun... but for love no .. LMAO.. stil newbie ..... -.- .....

I MADE IT.. nv login facebook,msn LOL JIE... but i saw her blog.. she posted again..she bought a CK bag to put her books and stuff.. LOL.. actually i wanan get her a gucci one for her b'day actually.. but i dun think it's from the heart cos juz a gift.. so i gave her puzzles,flowers,necklace,keychain,etc...... so so many things that i've done with care and from my heart....grandparents shfting into her hse...lol... GOD's plan..GOD THANK YOU.. it might not seem good for her.. but at least she can at least experience bigger family.. Bigger family= more problems, more problems = more courage to face them and more FAMILY LOVE... jiayou ba...she says she also wanan get another JOB LOL.... FORGET IT MAN.. HER SCH IS ALREADY GIVING HER A BIG PROBLEM+ some work .. still wan another job... LOL... need so much money??? LOL......she said also she's nv felt so happy before.. she FEELS that's what she wants..NO RESTIRCTIONS, NO NEED SEE PPLE FACE,AND HER FRIENDS SAY THAT TOO.. LMAO... I THINK SHE FUCKING MEAN WITH ME NOT HAPPI.... I RESTRICT HER SO MUCH... I ALWAYS GIVE HER FACE... WTF... SAYING BEHIND MY BACK??? WHEN 2gether DUN WAN SAY???? LOL... HER FRIENDS SAY SHE HAPPI???? LOL.... I GUESS HER FRIENDS ARE ALL WEARING MASK ALSO.. I CAN FEEL THAT MOST OF THEM ARE FAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ESP HER SCH FRIENDS..... ANYWAY NOT MY FUCKING PROBLEM NOW... SHE SUFFER OR WAT NOT MY PROBLEM.. JUZ DUN COME CRYING TO ME NX TIME... I WILL TEND NOT TO PITY HER BUT LAUGH AT HER.....I KNOW SHE WILL NOT... SHE WILL NOT SHOW ME THAT SHE's FALLEN OR WAT.... BUT... I CAN PREDICT IT... IT WILL COME TRUE.... IT's THE PATH SHE CHOOSE... i know jie although u care for her too but sorry.. i am also very selfish..i feel very very very sad by typing those CAPS on top... but it's really true... although wat i predicted yesterday was wrong.. it's still ok... it's the 1st wrong prediction...and i will not fail again....But still the same old saying.. I STIL LOVE HER.. I HOPE THOSE BAD THINGS WILL NOT GO TO HER BUT TO ME.. I AM WILLING TO ACCEPT THEM... >.< i am not saying i with me= GOOD.. but so many pple see how i treat her etc... i am very good liao lo.... ONLI THAT I DUN CARE ENOUGH FOR HER... SHE LIKE THIS... i dun flirt, i dun know gers behind her back, i dun beat her, i dun play or flirt with her, my love for her is true..aiya dun wan say so much le jie.. say le i more pissed off and disappointed...

ya... she posted in our personal blog..

"you're gone for weeks.. Heard from your "jie" tat u had a big fight with your dad. I tot everything between u n him is ok? What's wrong? He say u then u talk back right? Anyway, i oso cant say u... I myself oso like this.
I've tried studying at home n i realise tat i understand! Yes!
Reply me when u feel like ba... My nose pain."

BIG FIGHT WITH DAD IS A SUPER YES.. NOW i juz waiting for him to start the cue.. then i 1 shot say all out... most i find another place to stay... simple as ABC...ya she has no right to say me in a sense...STUDY AT HOME AND UNDERSTAND.. THAT's GOOD FOR HER!!!! VERY GOOD!!! AT LEAST MY PRAYERS COME TURE.. THANK YOU GOD AGAIn.... i feel like replying to her but something is pulling me.... something is saying dun..... FUCK SIA.. why ar....she already said she happi with what she is now wat.. so many many things i know i keep quiet.. LOL... if that's what she want then be it... MAYBE I TIE AND GIVE IN TOO MUCH TO HER IN THE PAST..... anyway no more nx time... no more girls will come into my love life again.. no more.. all of u say sure have de.. LET'S HAVE A BET MAN...i 100% no more LOVE ... onli LOVE for her.......like i said my heart onli has one ... and no one can replace her.. no matter how long or how good another girl appears ...........TOO BAD TO HER... i still have one in my heart that i love.. i am selfish sorry.....i am crazy,insane or watever u name it.. TOO BAD.... can put it in a way.. SAM HAS STOPPED LOVNG ANY OTHER GIRLS AT THE AGE OF 27!! YEAR 2009!!! GRATS!!!!!!!!!!! ^.^

ya jie , sometimes hor i feel that she email or typed in blog etc.... it seems like she still cares for me is it?? or she is guilty of making me like this????? i dunno sia.. i juz think and feel this way... watever it is... she loves me she will nt like this liao.... 1 year + relationship is like few days for her... put it in a bad way.. she broke off with her 4 YR RELATIONSHIP ... for me??? i think she still loves him in some ways... i noticed some things when we r 2gether but i keep quiet... i close 1eye.... so to her 1 yr + is wat... CHICKEN FEET??? to me 1 yr + is like 100 yrs.. lol... watever it is... something is keep telling me GIVE UP ON HER LA.. u know so many things liao still can endure???? u wan endure till how long.... u think u can endure long enough???? BUT LOVE TOLD ME... IF U REALLY LOVE HER... U MUZ OVERCOME THIS OBSTACLE.... IF U DO IT.... U WILL EXPERIENCE ANOTHER BETTER STAGE OF LOVE... GOOD LUCK...lol.. always got good and bad talking to me... zzzzzzzzzzzz i stil choose to follow my HEART!!! THAT's GODs hint to me.. ok GOD... i will do it....but pls guide and bless me....

Jiejie, sorry ... i think end of this yr i will be coming alone maybe .. lol.. u and peipei better plan a long schedule of funtime for me ok?? i dun wan wake up dunno go where.... u pple are the HOST i am the GUEST... so u muz do it nicely for me lol.....i wanna enjoy and play like a PRINCE... LOL... u tell peipei better PLAN PROPERLY HOR... OR I WILL FUCK HER UPSIDE DOWN!!!! LOL..... not "FUCK" hor... is SCOLD......and u too jie.... =x BUT i have to go JAPAN then go AUSTRALIA... SEE which place i wanna go 1st... I need to visit Auntie Lily... i promised her i going this october....i so long nv see takeshi and rei... >.< kind of miss them too.... lol... my 2 cute cousins...... -.- also going alone maybe... LOL..unless we are 2gether again... see how la... i dun have much hope in it already..... Jie ar Jie.... i am putting her into yr hands already ok??? i decided already... no more JADE if we really cannot get back 2gether.... NO MORE CONTACT ETC.... THAT'S IT!! I WILL BE MY OLD SAM.... MAybe better for me...nx time then i slowly tell u what i know... i send u u see le also will PISSED OFF 1... but i know u are a good person..... u still will side her cos she's a GIRL!!!!!!!!u always side girls de... zzzzzzzzzzzzz maybe cos u understand what girls are thinking... lol... si jiejie... bad bad 1....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....

As for Lawrence side.... sorry.... we met around 3 weeks or 2 weeks ago... lol... he came sg find me... -.- but dun worry... he says... i say ok... then he take action...... LOL... DUN WORRY JIE... i know wat to do la....he's so worried and feels sorry for me lol...... cannot blame him also... ya... he;'s getting UGLIER AND UGLIER.... MORE GANGSTER... MORE SUXS AND YA, DARKER...!!!!!!!!!LOL.... NOT AS WHITE AS BEFORE LOL......but he's more mature .... he now got limit 1... cannot overdo it also... LOL..not bad ar my brainwash to him....ahahahhahah... i find i am doing another good deed ^.^

ok i am so so tired now jie... good nite to u.... 2molo then i update ba... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz 2molo i got to work again and friday too..... SAD.............zzzzzzzzzzzzzz nitenite jie, nitenite minnie... miss u lots lots... ^.^

Morning Jie Jie~~

2009-05-06T10:50:00.004+08:00

Morning Jie ^.^ Today I am inherited by the DEVILS.. HAHA.. my mood is so super GREAT WHEN I WAKE UP ^^ HAHA................. I THINK I SHOULD NOT LOGIN FACEBOOK AND MSN LIAO... SERIOUS.... FROM NOW ONWARDS... TILL WHEN I AM FEELING BETTER AND HAPPIER.... HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH SO IF I NV REPLY IN FACEBOOK PLS UNDERSTAND...PLS TELL PEIPEI NOT TO WORRY TOO...THANKS..... BUT THERE's ONE WAY U CAN FIND ME.. I PROMISE TO ANSWER ANY CALLS FROM U .......THAT"S A PROMISE FROM ME TO U.... BUT MAKE SURE U ARE ALONE WHEN U SPEAK TO ME..

I FIND GOT SPIES OR PEOPLE TALKING BEHIND MY BACK AROUND ME... BUT I STILL DUNNO WHO... WHOEVER IS IT I FUCK CARE.... BUT IF I KNOW WHO IS THAT PERSON, I WILL SURE MAKE THAT PERSON SUFFER....REMEMBER WHAT I SAID... WHAT U HIDE NOW SURELY COME TO LIGHT 1 FINE DAY.. SOONER OR LATER.... EVEN IF 10 YRS LATER ... I WILL STILL REMEMBER AND START THE BALL.......I DUN CARE HOW PPLE SEE ME NOW!!!! I FUCK TUB OR IDIOT OR FUCKER OR CHILDISH OR STUPID OR WATEVER U NAME ME .. I DUN FUCKING GIVE A DAMN NOW... WHY AM I LIKE THIS??? GOD PLS DUN BLAME ME... I GOT REASONS TO DEFEND MYSELF.....I AM FORCED TO BE LIKE THIS... U KNOW WHY? U LOG IN FACEBOOK AND U KNOW WHY LIAO... THE COMMENT AND REMARKS.... SO FUCKING IMPLYING ME COS I SUSPECT SHE KNOWS THIS BLOG!!!!!!! IT'S JUZ A GUESS BUT MY GUESSES ARE ALWAYS PREDICTED CORRECTLY....I AM NOT STUPID TO DO SUCH THINGS.. I JUZ NEED TO OPEN MY GOLDEN MOUTH AND THINGS CAN BE DONE THE WAY I WAN THEM TO....HAHA... GOD GRANTS ME ALL THESE TYPE OF BAD THINGS.. IT"S A TEST OR TEMPTATION???????
I AM NOT SUSPECTING U JIE..DUN WORRY... I KNOW U STILL CARE AND "LOVE" ME ..... WHO REALLY TREATS ME GOOD OR BAD THROUGHTOUT THIS 2 MTHS... I ALSO KNOW... EVEN THE BLIND CAN SEE.... AND GOD KNOWS...... ANYWAY I NOT GONNA CARE... THIS IS MY LIFE... WHAT ROUTE I WALK IS MY FUCKING BUSINESS... THE THINGS I SHOULD NOT SEE DIE DIE STILL COMES TO MY EYES...LIKE MY DAD ALSO... HE PRETEND TO ACT CALM.. BUT I OVERHEAD HE SAYING ABOUT ME TO MY MOM LAS NITE......... LOL!!!!!!!!!!GOD PURPOSELY LET ME KNOW THINGS... GOD ARE U TESTING ME????? LMAO......... SO WHAT??? THINK I CARE?? THINK I BOTHER???? FUCK IT MAN.... GO HELL OR WAT I ALSO DUN CARE.....U CREATED ME WITH A FAMILY, A GF WHO I TRUELY LOVE, FRIENDS, BROS AND SISTERS... AND NOW U TEND TO TAKE THEM AWAY FROM ME... TAKE EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME... THIS GAME SO FUN FOR U GOD?? I AM SORRY TO SPEAK TO U THIS WAY BUT... IT's WORST THEN IN HELL.... U ARE TAKING ALL THE WONDERFUL THINGS IN MY LIFE, AND INTRODUCING BAD THINGS TO ME... IS THAT ANOTHER TEST???????? IS THAT A TEST FOR U TO MAKE WHAT I AM 5 yrs DOWN THE ROAD???? I DUNNo.... GOD PLS STOP THESE TESTS.. THEY ARE COMING ONE AFTER ANOTHER.. I DUN HAVE MUCH STRENGTH LIAO..... I GONNA FALL OFF THE CLIFF......... I GONNA FALL OFF THE MOUNTAIN.. I GONNA SINK IN THE SEA.... WILL U BE THERE TO SAVE ME?? WILL U BE THERE TO PULL ME UP OR GUIDE ME??? OR WILL U JUST SEE ME DROWN OR FALL... WHO WILL BE THERE FOR ME WHEN I AM DIEING, FALLING OR DROWNING????

I ACTUALLY WAS INTENDING TO FORGIVE AND FORGET LAS NITE... BUT!!!!!!!!!!!! NAH.. I HAD A DREAM LAS NITE... THE DREAM TOLD ME... DO WHAT U MUST DO!!! DO IT!!! JUS FUCK CARE WHAT PPLE SEE OR THINK OF U... ANYWAY U ARE FORCED TO DO IT!!!! AHAHHAHAHAHHAH.......THE DEVIL SUCCESS RATE WAS SO HIGH..THEY POLUTED MY MIND...... I DUN THINK I GONNA PUT IN EFFORT LIAO.... THINK I WILL CURRENTLY STOP STUDY OR WORK 1st... NO MOOD...I GONNA GO OVERSEAS AFTER MY 2nd REVIEW ON THE 13th OF MAY 2pm.... GO WHERE I STILL DUNNO....SEE HOW....

NOW I MUZ PLAN MY GAME OF CHESS... WHO TO SACRIFICE, WHO TO START THE CUE... WHO TO ATTACk, WHO TO DEFEND.. WHO TO TAG ALONG WITH,WHO TO MAKE THE SAY... WHO TO GUARD ME..... WHO TO MAKE THE FINAL MOVE AND THEN.... CHECKMATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMAO......................................... GOD MADE MY BRAINS THINK SO SO SO FAR.. THAT"S A TALENTED GIFT I ADMIT...I KNOW I THINK SO MUCH FURTHER THEN OTHER PPLE..... I AM ABLE TO ANALYZE THINGS FASTER AND MORE ACCURATE NOW....I THINK THE WAY A FORENSIC INVESTIGATOR DOES NOW... THTA"S ANOTHER SKILL I LEARN.....FOR GOOD AND BAD....I DUNNO... SEE HOW.. LET TIME DECIDE FOR ME.. FUCKING TIME AGAIN... EVERYDAY TIME TIME TIME.....ALTHOUGH THE REMARK WAS NOT SO HARSH... MAYBE TO HINT ME TO BE MATURE? MAYBE HINT ME THAT I WILL BE FORGIVEN ? MAYBE HINT ME THAT DON't LIKE can BECOME LIKE IF I DUN? MAYBE HINT ME THAT I WILL HAVE A CHANCE FROM HER AGAIN????AHHHHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHH................. I DUN FUCKING CARE NOW!!!!

SINGLE OR WAT I DUN CARE.. ATTACHED OR WAT I ALSO DUN CARE...I THINK LOVE TAUGHT ME HATRED!!!!!!!! I LOVE HATRED NOW.. I DUN LOVE LOVE ANYMORE.... LOVE IS A FAKE WORD IN MY LIFE... IT ONLI EXISTS TWICE... AND IT ALWAYS APPEARS TRUE BUT FALSE.... AND THAT IMPACT LOVE TAUGHT ME VERY MUCH TO HATE....AS LONG AS MY TAIL IS STEPPED........... THE GAME OF CHESS STARTS.... I AM SO SO SO FUCKING FORCED TO WALK THIS ROUTE NOW..... I OBSERVE SO MANY THINGS.. ONLI THAT I KEEP QUIET.. I KEEP QUIET COS I LOVE... I AM ABLE TO FORGIVE AND FORGET COS I LOVE...I CLOSE 1 EYE AND EVEN 2 EYES ALREADY...I THINK I HAVE THE 3rd EYE BUT I AM NOT ABLE TO CLOSE IT... SO............THE STEP IS SO FUCKING PAIN... THE PAIN IS WORST THEN WATEVER ACCIDENT I HAD BEFORE, LASIK OR WATSOEVER U NAME IT... LIKE PROPHETS SAID.. I BROKEN HEART CAN BE HEALED BY THAT SPECIAL PERSON...BUT A HEART WHICH IS STABBED DEEP ENOUGH CAN NEVER BE HEALED... NO MATTER HOW U HEAL IT OR COVER IT.. THERE WILL STILL BE A HOLE.. IF IT DOES... THERE WILL STILL BE A SCAR...... UNLESS MIRACLES HAPPEN....

Omg... Jie.. i actually cannot believe i wrote all these... i wanna delete them after reading them but.. i dun think so... it's my devil side coming out.. i wanna keep what i wrote and reflect it when i am free.. i need to control myself.....maybe i am too forced to it... i am sorry for making u worry again... but dun worry some things which i stated above are true onli.. most of them are false.. as for the chess thing .. yes... it's 100% true.. that's always my LOGIC and PHRASE in my life... My ultimate weapon... lol.... although i play this CHESS alone.. i know i will be able to do it... Most of my LIFE PLANS NV FAIL....AND THEY WILL NOT FAIL......EVEN it's 1 vs 100000 PPLE.. i will still tend to win.. i am very confident.. i have faith in myself and GOD.. and pple around me... i have faith that i will be able to accomplish it.. but there might be a price to pay... but i dun care or mind... whatever the price is.. i hope it falls on me.... no other innocent pple will be affected.. or my 2nd step of WEAPON will be out...and the effect will be 100000 times greater then this.. I SWEAR...

no matter what is it... i still love her as much as before... i will still wait for her....i still love my family.. i still love my bros,sisters and u jie..... jie.. u are a really very nice sister .... i dun regret to acknowledge u as my sister... i see u still care for me and HER..... u shown her care too...If i am not around maybe u can help me by caring of her... thanks jie... omg.. u are such a wonderful person.. may GOD bless u.... How much care u shown to me.. I know them all... every single little bit.. THANKS JIE... U ARE GREAT....!!!!!! i will also always remember who were there for me when i am in times of NEED.. i will remember who were there to encourage me.. who were there to take care of me...who were there for me when i was down... who were there for me when i needed HELP....were there to speak and listen to me... who were there to tell me what is right and wrong... so many many more... I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER THEM.. UNTIL THE DAY I DIE.. I WILL TELL PPLE WHO ARE THEY, HOW WONDERFUL THEY ARE.. HOW GREAT THEY WERE...

I am wondering if i should live my life in a MASK again.. i removed the mask few yrs back... but it always fails... FUCK MAN... RETRIBUTION??? lol.. i think i will mask myself again.. it will be better.. teach me jie what to do???should i continue to unmask it or mask it back???? I admit i am 27 this yr -.- ... but i still think like a FUCKTARD RETARD... LOL... maybe it's the turning point of me.. a point where it's the most important decision.. 3 more yrs i will be 30... wtf.... after this yr.. it will be a different me.. i know what to do now.... i will juz wait... i will think thorugh what i wrote on top.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i always do things in a clean and neat manner... i will nt do bad things... i will juz wait................ wait............wait.................. wait till the correct time............ wait till things goes GOOD ......................... or maybe wait till the day the game of CHESS STARTS!!.............. cya jie... i am going out already... i am going to WORK NOW!!! SIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!i dun wanan go but i promised pple liao.......... at least i still keep my promises LOL... ya jie.. maybe i will not go home for another couple of days.. i will find another place to stay.. staying at home makes me go CRAZY... -.- there are so so so so many things i dun understand till now.... SO MANY .... even if i ask u jie.. u also cannot answer me... seriously so many..... zzzzzzzzz i have another place to go on friday.........zzzzzzzzzzzz WORK WORK WORK AR..... nx week no more work.. no more sch.. see how haha..i am very cool down now.. the devil left me... lol... i am positive thinking now when i wrote these in small letters... trust me jie.. ^.^

ok jiejie byebye..i wil update later ..... ^.^

PAIN PAIN PAIN >.< >.< >.<

2009-05-06T01:12:00.003+08:00

jie ar.. ya.. i forgot to say also.. today noon, i washed our helmets as the weather is so hot.. lol.. i wash slowly and it smells so nice too lol....

Ya... since yesterday... my chest suddenly very very pain.. dunno why.. pain until like wanan die.. juz now when bathing also suddenly like this.. i think i gonna REALLY reduce smoking liao... i scare to die ... i haven do finish my things or go places i wanna go cannot die yet...i think maybe nx week i book 1 appointment for body checkup ... zzzz and ya.. maybe i will be going to kl this friday or sat.. or nx week.. see how 1st...................at here very sian zzzz..

ok jiejie.. i go slp le.. very tired and pain pain.. eyes also pain, chest pain, leg pain.. wtf... all pain coming.. why nt pain till i die lol.. Juz KIDDING ^.^ ...nitenite jie...

o ya JIE.. i think got change of plans.. i seen something i should not be seeing LOL.. 2molo or wat then i update tell u .. ^.^ nitenite

Tired~~~

2009-05-05T23:54:00.002+08:00

Jie ar jie... today hor.. i did so many things.. mindef called me about my deferment for nx mth's ICT 2 weeks.. zzzzzzzzzz i prepared a list and reasons why i cannot go back reservist lol... SUXS MAN.. so waste time.... and i send the list of degree MODULES for all my classmates... that's for studying in SG .. so fated sia... my course onli 2 unis in the WORLD has it.. and both needs to be studied overseas UNLESS U SELFSTUDY IN SG and it's SURE DIE FOR ME... GOD WAS SO GOOD AND PLANNED FOR ME.. THIS YR.. ONE OF THE UNI IS OFFERING THE OLD TRADITION WAY TO STUDY IN SG.. GOT LECTURERES TO TEACH US HERE IN SG.. SO GOOD AND WONDERFUL LO.... WOO.........and hor ,i dunno how a lady got my number... ask me dunno wat join wat business la... something like MLM or watever but i say not free lol...................i think i gonna change my hp number again lol..............................see how -.-

Jie ar.......................dun so impatient leh.. i nv post blog u facebook me... -.- and pls DUN LET Peipei KNOWS!!! PLEASE AND THANKS!!!! i went to the library today at cck... i wanted to borrow books for my project.. good boy hor me.. lol....i walk walk around and found some... then after that i went home... i saw she TYPED IN HER BLOG.... nowadays, she go class half way and go home.. WTF.. even if the class boring or wat.. at least study all and know what's going on wat... i wonder what her sch mates are teaching her or influencing her....they dun wan pass at least dun teach her bad la......money is hard to earn and time is precious...... faster finish faster graduate...... zzzzzzzz i kinda of regret to ask her to study actually.....she told me she wanna concentrate on her studies but LOOK.... say and nv do it... zzzzzz very disappointed... at least attend the whole class so u know wat..i know she's tired or wat but... no choice wat... haiz.. dun wan talk so much liao......zzzz and she keeps talking about val val val since the previous blog posts... i think this val is the one i saw in facbook who KISSED her at facebook las mth... i think valson something...DUNNO WHO THE FUCK IS HE.. but i know muz be a guy who is trying to chase her or wat or her classmate...also dunno where he is from.. i juz hope he's nt the one to spoil our relationship ba...but i know he was there to KISS HER IN FACEBOOK LAS MTH WHEN WE WERE ROCKY... although it's juz a kiss but.. zzzzzzz u should know what i mean ar jie.... if YES... he sure GOOD GAME!! i will walk back my old steps again to deal with this...i fuck care if he is rich or older then me or more friends then me or watsoever.. i got my ways to do things.... not say i dare not play with him... i dun care liao... i dun care if she hates me more or wat but if it is really what i PREDICTED... HE SURE DIE!!!but best is not... juz hope ba... although i old now.. i know wat to do... i got my ways.. is onli i wan a not...jie u remember lawrence? my class de?? i tell him he sure 100% help me 1... lol......but see how ba.. maybe i should forgive and forget if things goes well.. see how... see my mood.. see what is the outcome or result... see if GOD approves me to do it.. aiya i very blur now lol..... juz 1 remark i make sure a big fuss.. i am like a LOSER... she's nt my gf i cannot care or mind... but.... i still treat her as one even if she does nt... i wan her to be WISE, SMART, i wan her to be HAPPY! i wan her to feel LOVED and ENJOY GOOD TIMES, GOOD FAMILY LOVE , ETC.....eh jie ... at least i not like my class that andrew lo... u remember he and his gf 8 yrs... then he so fucker until he make no guys dare go near her.,.. LOL.. and he did it lo... AT LEAST I NOT LIKE HIM... I NOT SO SELFISH.. AHAHAHHA.......aiya jie u know me so long u should know my pattern ba.... sorry to be so like this jie.. i dun mean it.. maybe i juz HOT when i sees it.. zzzzzzzzz dun worry 2molo i will be ok le.... ^.^ i still keep learning to forgive and forget... =) GOD KNOWS.. GOD KNOWS EVERYTHING.. IF I HIDE NOW AND NO ONE KNOWS, GOD KNOWS... ZZZZZZZZZZZZ GOD KNOWS SO MANY THINGS MAI TELL ME, MAI HINT ME.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ok sry for the caps... sry GOD, sry jie >.< lol.. the devil is in me zzzz sry.. i juz FUCK HIM OUT... lol...u SEE THE WORK FUCK PLS dun think i like las time hor jie... I TOTALLY CHANGE LIAO ^.^....

and elmo is BOTAK???omfg... he's ugly??? he disturbs her and barks and keep crying.. omg.. my poor elmo >.< .... sry daddy cannot take care of u... i cannot even bring u back or see u... if nt i need to find a place to stay myself......but ELMO pls cannot make yr mummy angry ok??u muz talk to her in yr heart elmo and make her feel happi, make it when she sees u she's happi... =) good boy ok elmo... u stil muz be as cute as before.. remember the 1st day when we brought u back.. u were so small,frightened and so cute.. i miss those times... >.< and no matter what , u are still our baby forever..!!!! Maybe u cannot see us married elmo... maybe u can.. i dunno.. but if cannot.. daddy will say sry and byebye to u for the las time.. dun worry i will still see u for thelast time... I PROMISE elmo.....i need to leave u behind here.... i gtg somewhere far from this place... to live alone.... maybe 1 day u will still reunite with me or maybe in our nx life?? =( =( =(

sry ar jie.. about my dad things.. nx time then say.. now still no mood to talk about it....maybe i will DO IT when things really goes bad at home.. Sorry if i do that but i really cannot take it.. this hatred between us is for like 10yrs already... dad dun know i went for lasik till now , onli mom knows... IF HE KNOWS.. SURE 100% QUARREL AGAIN... so i need to hide from him as long as i can... mom also said cannot let him know.. or if we quarrel, she dunno how to help us liao.. MAY GOD BLESS US......i admit through minnie mouse(JADE), we are in better terms, even with my bro... we talk more often.. but the effect TAKES IMMEDIATELY... in this 2 mths + without her beside me.. THINGS GO BACK THE WAY IT SEEMS BEFORE..... Maybe it's fated? maybe it's another test??? i dunno zzzzzzz

and ya ... i met a guy called MR THAM juz now, he's a sch mate's uncle who does IT line too.. i am helping him to go onsites and do jobs for him... we met up and he passed me money for he owed me..... lol.. we talked for a while also... talk about my lasik la.. studies etc..... when i hear the word LASIK NOW... IT REMINDS ME OF HER.........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz becos of her i went lasik... LOL... maybe nx time becos of her i will cut botak or put tattoo again? LOL.. see how... see how... time is always against me.. I NEED TO CONTROL TIME THEN LET TIME CONTROL ME.. I WANNA BE TIME's MASTER.. I HOPE I CAN AND I WILL TRY TO LOL.......very ambitious ar... lmao.....i took a few pictures today but.. not posting now.. kinda of lazy... 2molo is a boring day for me i guess.. zzzz jie ar jie.. i got so many things to tell and share with her.. but hor SORRY.. some things cannot tell u de.. AHAHAHHAHAH.. hope u dun mind.. =x okok... i think i will stop here now.. my leg suddenly got blood dunno why.. i think juz now i knocked onto my FUCKING BED zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....................i gtg have a cool bath and do some sch stuff and slp le... nitenite jiejie... ^.^

Afternoon Jie~

2009-05-05T12:59:00.002+08:00

Afternoon.. i was surfing the webbie for my sch stuff and this pop up happened to appear.. so i click and -.- all the love quotes are found there... i gone through all of them and found most of them i find meaningful.. it's not i WANNA GIVE UP!! but it makes sense.... No matter wat i will still not give up and wait for her.... I do not know how long will it take but... i will continue to wait..... i know waiting is kinda of foolish... but to love is to wait... see the las love quote... "He who is not impatient is not in love." I am in love so i am waiting... ^.^

Sometimes i am afraid love will also turn it into hatred!!!!! Maybe it's the devils playing mind games with me... i sat down or lie down on the bed quietly.... and think......... Am i not happy? Am i hating her? Why am i waiting? Am i still loving her? What am i thinking... i had this thoughts almost everyday...and the final result everyday is = I SERIOUSLY LOVE HER,I WILL WAIT!Unless i am lack of strength ...... i will leave..... i believe Love and GOD and everyone outs there who encourages me or supports me(ANGELS) is still prolonging my strength...if not i would have already broken down 1 mth ago.........i do have thoughts of avoiding this.... by juz booking an air ticket and leave here for couple of mths.... but.. i cannot bear to do it.... i am afraid... this will make things worst.... i am already 27 this yr.. i need to know what's right and wrong... but.... nvm about it... let's skip this for the moment...

I wanna be alone jus to sort things out.... sometimes i dun even know what i am trying to sort... maybe i juz wanan be alone??? i dun know either.... i tend not to know more about myself now.... i tend not to know what i want sometimes... i know some .... I WAN OUR RELATIONSHIP TO BE BETTER... TO REUNITE.... I WAN HER BACK IN MY LIFE, TO SHARE AND GO THROUGH LIFE WITH ME....I WANT TO SHARE WITH HER WHAT I KNOW IN LIFE.. MY EXPERIENCES, THOUGHTS AND THINKING.....I WANNA SHARE WITH HER WORDS OF WISDOM FROM SOME CUSTOMERS WHO HAVE ENLIGHTENED ME..... I WANNA FASTER COMPLETE MY LAST TERM... I WANNA FASTER GET A DEGREE, THEN MASTER...I WANNA EARN MORE MONEY.....I WAN HER TO ENJOY LIFE... I WAN TO LIVE BY THE SEA WITH LOTS OF DOGS AROUND US ... WE WILL BE HAPPY EVERYDAY WITHOUT AND WORRIES...... BUT WHY????IS MONEY REALLY A SIN OR DEVIL???? Without money we cannot do many things.... but with money... pple tend to do more bad things...... sigh...My customer used to tell me... AS LONG AS YOU AND YR FAMILY(WIFE,GF,PARENTS) ARE HAPPY EVERYDAY... NO SUM OF MONEY CAN BUY THAT.. IF YOU ARE RICH .. YOU MAY NOT BE HAPPY EVERYDAY... it's TRUE...... i have some friends who are filthy rich.... their family have lots of problems, or they might have illness or more... Well done.. this world is full or sins, temptations... Humans tend to walk into traps of devils easily or maybe without even knowing it.... sigh.... omg.. i tend to speak more like a priest?teacher?LOL........

Alright jie... i am going to have a walk somewhere nearby.... kinda of bored -.- maybe i will find some notes in the library which will help for my projects... as for my eyes.. when i dropped the 1st drop into my eye.. it's burning my eyes... i dunno why.. maybe it's dirty.. but it's freaking PAIN PAIN....... >.< but now, i think it's better.... k k..... i go liao.. update later ^.^

Love quotes~

2009-05-05T12:44:00.004+08:00

Love Quotes:

1.My heart to you is given: Oh, do give yours to me; Well lock them up together, And throw away the key.

2.As we grow older together, As we continue to change with age, There is one thing that will never change. . . I will always keep falling in love with you.

3.I love you, not for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.

4.If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be.

5.They say loving you gives pains and full of sacrifices But I'll rather take pains and lots of sacrifices than not to be love by you.

6.I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

7.The ones that you love the most are usually the ones that hurt you the most.

8.Is a life worth living, without no one to love and to be loved in return?

9.If you love someone you would be willing to give up everything for them, but if they loved you back theyd never ask you to.

10.If i has to choose between loving you, and breathing. I would use my last breath to say I LOVE YOU.

11.Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice but falling in love with you I had no control over.

12.Love is a promise, love is a souvenir, once given never forgotten, never let it disappear.

13.Friends will keep you sane, Love could fill your heart, A lover can warm your bed, But lonely is the soul without a mate.

14.He who is not impatient is not in love.

Reporting To Marie Jie On Today's Activity -.-"

2009-05-05T01:47:00.002+08:00

I tell u i tell u jie... today is a -.- day............ end up i went to sch... wanted to eat.. and WTF.. ALL CLOSE!!!! my fucking friend say got open.. end up nv eat.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz i jio him go mac.. he mai... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz then went to lessons lo... i sit 1st row cos cannot see clearly.. and after 1 hr + around 8.30.. i bth and went back.... the projector's light is making my eyes very very painful... so pain until i wanna cry... i keep putting the eye drop but still pain zzzz... actually wanna meet weekiat(calvin) but hor... i decided nt to.. i dun wanan talk to anyone or meet anyone NOW!!!!! so i nv call or sms him.. i decided to be alone 1st... maybe i can do it maybe not.. if u see i nv update means cannot.....then i went back to yew tee.. i was walking and deciding wat to eat.. end up i go the new YEW TEE POINT.. BUT... i cannot SEE CLEARLY.. WTF... so i walk anyhow and went into hong kong cafe to eat... i ordered curry chicken and toast bread and milk tea.. the curry SUXS...WORST EVER CURRY I EVER EAT... NO TASTE 1... the bread= suxs to the max also... worst then when minnie and me went to bukit timah's one.....then leh.. i go home lo... go back open the door see my father face= ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ... i dun wan talk and look at him and i straight walk into my room, close the door and do my own things...

was reading a book till now... and i dun understand it.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wtf man.. i read for almost 3 hrs.. now is 2am here.. and i fucking dun get the meaning or understand it!!!!! I am so fucking pissed off... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..................................

u see those pics i took.. all LOOK SO SUPER UGLY... i wondering if i wanna cut or nt.. lol.. what should i do???zzzzz then hor.. these few weeks.. i keep wondering if i should go into the TEACHING LINE instead of IT.. maybe i will still do IT but part-time ba.... My sch lecturer jio me go NTUC teach old pple about computers.. 1 hr 40-60$... but dunno i wan a nt lol... imagine jie... I AM A TEACHER.. LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!all the students sure fail or kanna fuck upside down... lol.... dunno how yet.. still considering... see how ba.. but if i go into teaching , nx time wan migrate so much easier... aiya i also dunno lol.. give me some advice when i am ready to speak and call u.. u go jot down on a paper or textpad file 1st.. then nx time when we talk u open and refer to it ok jie??? treat it as doing a favour for me.. xie xie.. ^.^who knows nx time i might teach yr kids... =x ahahahha... imagine students calling me MR SAM.. can i hand up my homewok tomorrow? ROFL LMAO......but .... dunno haha... i very tired and eyes today so so pain.. now also pain... i think i need to catch some slp and take the las sleeping pill provided by the eye clinic... Nitenite jie... i think u are slping like a PIG NOW!!! AHAHAHHAHAH.... although i dun wanna ans yr call or talk to u... i at least type here for u to see lo.. u are the onli one who can sees it.. and PLS dun let peipei see or know it.. it's a secret between u and me ^.^... nitenite jie... dun need worry so much bout me .. =)

ugly pics

2009-05-04T23:15:00.002+08:00

Pics taken in the afternoon and evening today.... and at home... LOL.. my hair looks so suxs.. think of whether wanan cut or nt....

2nd day after sugery

2009-05-04T23:06:00.007+08:00

Pics i spent a lot of time sorting them out.. In a shop in serangoon which sells antiques... i am looking for an hr glass.

Pic names=Thinking of u and My Family!!!!!!

Pics taken under a block at serangoon...

This is taken on the 2nd day Wednesday after my sugery.. i went for the 1st review at 9am.. WTF lo.. so early.. i walked to far east plaze opposite and took a bus to serangoon... -.- .... the walk is so so far and tiring.. lol the 2nd review will be on 13th of may wednesday 2pm.. -.- sian again zzzz

Pictures I would like to let u all see...

2009-05-04T22:58:00.004+08:00

Look at my eyes on the 2nd day.. got blood clog... and so obvious.. >.<
imagine the pain i got... sad man... zzzzzzzzzz

Oily Oily face for 3 days without washing it... FUCK THE OIL.. LOL

This Pics are taken on the day after my sugery... Las Tuesday.. i have to slp like this for 3 days.. no washing of hair or face.. and when i wake up my face is super oily.............................see above...

Back Home -.-"

2009-05-04T16:13:00.007+08:00

Went walking around chinatown today.. seen so many nice things... guess wat i eat today???? PRAWN MEE... WHAHAHHA.... nice nice but fucking ex...zzzzzzzzzzzz then i decided to pack up and go home today.. i check out form the hotel and took a cab home... and i juz got home now~.. my room looks so tidy.. i think my mom tidy them for me... zzzzzzzzz it seems good to be at home but... dunno la.. cos my dad nt back yet.. SEE HOW.. IF 2nite HE KP ME AGAIN.. I SURE LEAVE AGAIN.. AND MAYBE FOR GOOD!!!!!!!!!we had a very very bad arguement las week... so big until he like wanna DISOWN ME!!!!!!! KNN 1 right he.... like i no money like this zzzzz... Pls dun call up my hse to talk about it.. i dun wan it to be worst..i will settle it myself when the time is correct...... Thanks jie...later got sch.. but i think no mood to go.. it's aleady the 2nd week of lessons.. and i haven gone for even 1 ... LOL... see how la... my mind not stable i go there also no heart.... sorry jie... >.< sry everyone....sry minnie...

My eyes... omg... gd and nt good.. dunno how to say.. today weird weird 1... zzzz maybe it will be ok ba....logged into facebook for a while... i saw JADE went from being "it's complicated" to "in an open relationship".... zzz what does it means??? i have the temptation to change mine to Married To Jade Teo.. but i scare... LMAO... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz omg.. many thoughts running around my head... zzzzzzzzzz by seeing that i feel that the answer to me is getting closer and closer... but the answer will be worst and worst... OMG MAN... pls SOS and HELP me GOD!!!!!!!!!!why i so so so love her and she knows it and she still dun wanan accept back my love???? is it got someone else??? is it she dun love me liao? is it she got nth to say to me?or is it something else???arrrr... i dunno..... all these are so unfair to me lo.......kao.....WHY SIA WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????????

ya i remembered she email me.. saying i wanna mia. and she hopes to hear from me.and my eyes i need to take care... her results were good... seriously speaking, i did lasik cos of her... i wan her to have a bf or husband she loves to see without glasses everyday.. so i choose to went for lasik.. i admitted i quite regret but hor for her i dun mind... i will endure it...i regretted cos my vision is not perfect,i still cannot see clearly now.... i cannot wash my eyes or rub them, i need to lubricate them every hour!! and each tube costs 55cents...i will try to take care of my eyes but all these are fated by GOD la... if GOD wan u blind u sure blind.. as for the mia again.. nope... i juz wanan cool down.. i got problems in MY TRUE LOVE, family... zzzzzzzzzzzzz all these are driving me crazy ... family maybe consists of 10% of my life while LOVE consists of the remaining 90%...u know my dad and my quarel was super big??? ZZZZZ but i dun wanna talk about it now... the more i talk about it.. the more i wanna leave home......i juz feel like i cannot let her go .... zzzzz it's kinda of selfish .. but .... u all also said.. if u find yr TURE LOVE... u muz cherish and fight for it... so i did it... not becos u all told me, is becos u all encouraged me to do what is right! And i am doing it cos i really really love her...i am not cheating or playing wit her.. She wans to hear from me but i am scare our conversaton will end fast again.. so i stopped.. i actually was replying half way but end up i cancel zzzzzzz... i scare ar JIE... so so so scare.... but seriously if really bad answer.. i also dunno wat to do liao...i will be lost from 90%-99% zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... pray and hope everyday that things turns good ba... i believe GOD also can see what i have been doing and if i really love her a not lo.... But i cannot touch GOD and her... ZZZZZZZ not enough???? zzzzzzzzzz as for her results.. she nv study get B.. if i study can get A... that's good!! but i am afraid she will tend to take advantage of it.. not always so lucky de... no matter what she still muz study regardless if the paper is hard or easy.. so at least after the paper or when the results are out.. she knows that she had done her best...i jus hope she can quickly complete her studies... if not she will be so stress about her assigments , bridging or exams again.... she said JIAYOU.. yeah.. i will JIAYOU for her TOO!!!! her mom nagged her about our relationship... she's very angry.. i knwo she's nt in the mood to talk about this but... maybe she should juz have a nice talk with her mom.. no matter what family members are still closer then anyone else... they born u out..maybe she did nt spend much family time or try to have a good talk with them... remembered las time she dun talk to her mom de.. then their relationship got better when i appeared... NOT BECOS I AM PROUD or wat.. is that maybe i feel i am doing something good... i want her to feel the love of a family.. she's gone through so many bad things including family things.. i have not.. i dun understand but i know i will and must try to rebuild that good bond between her and her family...if i fail... what i can onli do is to pray for her.. my prayers now consists of so many pple, My minnie mouse,all her family members, mine family , me and my close frends,bros and sis..

JIE AR.. can u and peipei stop flooding my wall.. zzzzz thanks ... i see le very headace sometimes... i know 2 of u are very concern of me...but dun worry... i will still continue to update here.... ^.^ so i will let u all know about my things... what i do , what i think.. etc....see later wanan go out or go sch.. might be meeting weekiat(calvin) for dinner maybe later? i haven meet or talked to him for almost a week... lol... i juz spend this week alone in the hotel... and few friends (darren and his friends)to meet up and eat with me.. got once they brough mj up.. kanna COMPLAINT.. LMAO.... then no choice lo... i everyday watch tv, surf net for places i wanan go in future... plan for my future.. ways to earn extra income...how to win her back(but i think i cannot, i am super lousy in this,LOL(that's why u all angels came to speak to me and give me advice, hints, encouragement...))....it's 5pm now.. time passes so slowly when i am home.. zzz ok i update 2nite ba... cya jie...

Cold Nite~~~~

2009-05-04T10:18:00.003+08:00

Morning everyone, it's so freaking COLD HERE.. How i wished minnie is here to hug me and shelter me from the COLD..... =x i looked out.. FUCK it's raining heavily.... i got into msn... and her msn was="Some people are just so fake.Zou lang 50.50.tio ho."Jus hope that those pple who are around her whom are fake to FUCK OFF and leave her alone...sigh..GOD can u PLS guide her and help and accompany her now!! currently juz ignore me.. i know what i am doing.. PLEASE GOD.. even if it will take another few yrs of my life.. i dun mind....she's getting more and more vulgar too.... omg... what i used to change her all came back... it's like no use liao...she's like back to her old self before i knew her... -.- GOD HELP !!! SOS!!!!

Jie ar.... Peipei msg me in facebook.. -.- what u told her again ar??zzzzzzzzzzz ya.. i remembered her liao.. that time u met me wit my auntie to have dinner.. and she came along also right.... LMAO.....she looks totally so different and she's prettier and prettier lmao....wa.. she now studying masters.. wtf man... me degree also haven reach u 2 climb so fast -.-zzzzzzzzzzz i see liao also like sad and slow lo.....but nvm la... can u believe i stayed here for almost close to 1 week liao... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ place is ok onli that... it's so boring.... i will go home at certain times in a few days to change and get clothes... see how ba.. maybe stay till today or 2molo then i leave... broke liao..zzzzzzzzz ok ... i posted a song which i find it very nice... it kinds of suits me lol.. so many ssongs suit me now.. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ here are the lyrics...

If I got down on my knees and I pleaded with you,If I crossed a million oceans just to be with you,Would you ever let me down?
If I climbed the highest mountain just to hold you tight,If I said that I would love you every single night,Would you ever let me down?
Well, I'm sorry if it sounds kinds sad,It's just that I'm worried,So worried that you'll let me down.Because I love you, love you, love you, so don't let me down.
If I swam the longest river just to call your name,If I said the way I feel for you would never change,Would you ever fool around?
Well, I'm sorry if it sounds kinds bad, it's just that I'm worried,I'm so worried that you'll let me down.Because I(love you, love you), love you, love you.
Well I'm sorry if it sounds kinds bad, it's just that I'm worried,Yes, I'm so worried that you'll let me down.Because I love you, love you,Oooh, I love you, love you, love you.

I can do all sorts of things jus to say i love her.. and because i love her..........^.^

i going to find breakfast.. hungry ... and muz put eye drop again... updater later.. ^.^

THE FOOD HERE IS GREAT!!!

2009-05-04T01:21:00.002+08:00

Jus finished eating hor fun.. wow.. the prawns are fresh and nice.. so many pple said no PRAWNS for u cos u had lasik.. I FUCK CARE MAN.. infection or watever i dun care liao.. best is die earlier.. no need to worry so much.. and i can stand before GOD to ask him.. To ask him so so so so many questions.. LOL.. but maybe GOD will nt wan me to die so early.. maybe GOD wanna put me into more tests.. zzzz GOD is this my retribution or karma??? WTF i changed so much already since i came out from chalet till now... ALL my friends know them too.. i believe u know it but why... CAN U PLS COME INTO MY DREAMS AND GIVE ME THE ANSWERS OR HINTS????

i am feeling so tired now.. i am really tired of waiting everynite in front of this FUCKING SCREEN... but it's the choice i made.. at least i see her on.. i know she's back safe and sound..i can sleep well and soundly... and i feel GOD is protecting and guiding her... it's sounds kinda foolish but.. I dun mind... i love her...I LOVE HER SO SO MUCH!!! i know she is outside everyday enjoying but i am torturing myself everyday .. ya... so many of u said.. she's young.. she still wanna play.. cos in her life she haven even started playing and now is the time she wants to play... But she tells me she wana study.. zzzzzzzzzzzzzz OF course i hope she does well in her studies.. at least i nv regretted encouraging her to study or find the sch and course for her.. SOMETIMES i think YA I REGRET... But.. NAh... it's good for her.. at least nx time when she's older she at least got diploma or above wat.. now society all se PAPER... that's why i wanna study also WTF...my studies killed our relationship... FUCK IT LO... SHOULD NOT STUDY AT THE 1st PLACE AND JUZ CONCENTRATE ON MY BUSINESS AND MAYBE IT's BETTER... zzzzzzzzzzzzz........LOL.. it's so GREAT right?? LOVE IS GREAT!! i sometimes really wonder.. wtf am i doing, wtf am i thinking, wtf do i want, wtf wtf wtf.... This is really the 1st time in my life that i am like this.. like the turning point of life... zzzzzzzzzzz......THE 1st AND LAST TIME... NO MORE NEXT TIME!!! Jie.. u also say 1st time see me like this.. LOL... i think it's time u will see a new "didi" after this... Dun worry... if nx time we go find u 2gether hopefully, u muz bring us go many many places hor... ask peipei along also... u 2 = my tour guide.. HAHAHAHAHAH.......but if...........i know what to do before i leave THIS PLACE if things comes in the worst way... I will and i Must or i will regret for life!!!!!!!!!

Alright.. i think i am gonna have a walk downstairs then i go back and slp.... I sms my bro.. he's using my com to play games for the past few days cos he's botting on his own PC.. i think i go back SURE 100% tio virus... he's a fucktard noob retard computer idiot who always tio virus... ok jie.. i will update again 2molo ... u dun worry so much about me ok??? i know what's right and wrong.. what to do and what not to.. TRUST ME jie... but i know u surely still worry about me 1 zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ... missing and loving her so so so much .... >.< Muacksmuacks minnie...

Tired & Bored....

2009-05-03T22:54:00.006+08:00

Today was a -.- day... went to fetch sis meiling from the airport.. she's back from hongkong and her face was so freaking BLACK .. -.-.... ke lian... i tot she went there will be happier when she came back..... but... lmao... My eyes are recovering i guess.. i am beginning to see more clearly but onli that it's too fucking dry.. i still cannot see far far... yesterday i drove my friend's car.. WTF.. i can drive lol... heng i nv get into any trouble.. hahha......BUT HOR...every hr muz waste 55cents.. WTF.. and it's kinda making me pissed off... wasting my precious money......kind of regret LASIK.. but.. too bad.. what done cannot be undone...

Si Marie jie... tell peipei about my problem.... zzzz nv ans her call she use this tatic..WA KAO LO.... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.... i wanna go find them... i am so so bored in sg.. gonna go crazy anytime... but.. muz finish this fucking las term.. faster finish and i am free liao... can go anywhere i wan anytime...damn ... i kinda of miss minnie so so so so much... haven seen her or call her or hug her or kiss her for 2 mths liao zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......but i think she's enjoying herself outside ba.. like she said.. i am selfish.... i juz wanna be happi!!! ok lo.. u wan happi u go ahead lo... i also cannot say anything...i also not her bf now....zzzzzzzzzzzzz TOO BAD SAM.. TOO BAD.... GOD AR GOD.... why sia... why like this? why this happen? why ? why ? why? zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz GOD... should i GIVE UP?? I am lost and tired.. i tried my very very best 100% to make her feel loved and happi but nth happens or nth helps... no effect ............. i know i still love her as much as before.. i am STILL LOVING HER ... u send so many obstacles and traps for me in this 2 mths, but i believe in myself and her.. my heart still tells me.. there's onli 1 in my heart.. and that's her... MINNIE MOUSE...GOD.. pls stop testing me or wat again pls... it's no use....Juz answer my prayers and help me pls... =(

She emailed me early in the morning 6.07am... WTF she's slping later and later... going out till so so late and nt slping early.... but it's not my problem now... i HOPE it's my problem but i am in no position to care for her again.... SUPER SAD... Not i wanna mia.. is like i am very very lonely now.. juz wan some time alone.. cancelled all appointments for the time being juz to destress myself.. wanan go overseas but cannot.......... fuck the lasik.... did not wanna ans yr call not cos i busy.. it's cos i am afraid that our conversation will be short...u have nth much to talk to me.. but do u know i have lots and lots of things to tell u, to share with u....... sigh.....i am very HAPPI yet FRIGHTENED when i see the call.... i am afraid jus so afraid..... i am becoming more timid... i am becoming more useless.. i am afraid i will lose u forever.. zzzzzzzzzz damn it... this suxs.......maybe 1 day i should juz leave ..... leave this place... leave this sorrowful and painful place... go to a place where nobody knows me... start afresh... that's what i really call MIA...but see how ba... juz planning but it might nt work out either... maybe good things happen and made me stay.. i also dunno.. let's see what GOD has to do... what decision will she make.... how much she knows i loves her.. how much she mean to me...how much i care for her.. and finally how much she is in my heart now....

FUCK the aircon.. making my eyes dry...need to waste another 55cents... zzzzzzzzzzzz

I Am TOTALLY NOOB in This =x

2009-05-03T09:46:00.004+08:00

Whahaha.. Staying in the hotel suxs!!! Everyday wake up dunno go where, do what. Although the aircon runs 24hrs, i can smoke as and when i like, i can go and buy food nearly, order up, etc...BUT.. many china girls around.. hear their voice= TURN OFF + NO MOOD... Too bad, i have totally no interest in girls already..eh friends, although i used to be flirt las time now i 100% change liao hor.. HAHA... meet me then u all know... u can try bring yr friends to intro me also no use 1 .....haha..although i see them but still no INTEREST..Lmao..... maybe cos of 1 person in my life that changed me after my 26+ years of life in this world.... ^.^ who knows, maybe nx time i will be a bachelor or someone who roams the world alone to meet more new pple? ^.^ anyone wanna join me?? Muz booking 1 hor..haha..

Totally no mood to log in facebook or msn.. sorry to all who are looking for me.. Esp Marie Jie..It's very boring.. log in= heart attack sometimes(Last Time).. I love to wait and wait las time... but... always waited and got nthing out of it..zzzz.. dun see me IMPATIENT hor.. i now can wait very very long 1... haha.. BUT if meet me pls dun late hor.. or i surely FUCK U UPSIDE DOWN.......pple keep asking me or talking to me... i feel very very irritated or pissed off.. Sorry to all..Maybe it's the time when i am reaching my "menses period".. hahah......but i always tell myself.. relax... 忍... Wait patiently......lf these are God's Plan, God made this test or route for me to walk.. It's onli how i handle it.....But i always tell myself this simple logic..I ALWAYS BELIEVE IN KARMA OR RETRIBUTION!! GOT LIMIT TO MY PATIENCE 1 HOR..U FUCKING TRY TO STEP OR CROSS MY PATH, I FUCKING MAKE SURE U SURELY SLOWLY SUFFER AND I WILL SLOWLY TORTURE U !AS LONG AS HOW LONG I CAN LIVE! THIS I SWEAR IT MAN...ONLI WHEN I WILL START IT NIA... God always said, forgive and forget. But to me, somethings and sometimes i can , some cannot.. see how.. see my mood, see i happi or not..see whether GOD really change my mindset. =x

For this past 2 mths, i find my thinking have changed a lot, i have changed TOO MUCH.. some pple say GOOD some say BAD..I improved to Think FURTHER then before. I tend to treat things and solve them by Forensic ways.Too much to say.. lazy..nx time then i say.... now i think what i really want most is to WORK HARD AND EARN FREAKING LOTS OF MONEY and FASTER COMPLETE MY STUDIES... And MOST importantly, My Gf to come back to me.... Although we broken off... i still treat her as my gf.. i may be foolish or stupid but, pls friends , pls understand my feelings.. thanks...Some pple say it will take mths or maybe years.. but... i also dunno la... zzzz jus so many BAD things happen at the WRONG TIME FOR ME... FUCK LO... WHY SO ZHUN 1.. BUY TOTO 4D also not so zhun..Maybe GOD arrange all this to happen, but wa lao... why sia.. why on me? why when the time is totally disadvantage for me.... >.< If maybe she finds 2gether with me suxs.. i also no choice.. i did my very best liao...i change but "it's too late" ( what she said) I dun believe that anything is too late to change... onli a matter of time....but no matter what... i will still wait for her.. even when i grow old, i gonna die, my hair turns white or etc..... many pple asked, if one day after many many years she come back to u, how will u react? i said.. i seriously dunno...i know i really love her and still loving her onli in my life.. i find we will maybe be 2gether or not again.. we might= HOPE THE BEST THINGS ALWAYS HAPPENS TO US AGAIN , OUR RELATIONSHIP WILL BE BETTER AND BETTER.. WE WILL LOVE EACH OTHER MORE AND MORE.... ^.^ IF NO= HOPE SHE FINDS SOMEONE WHO TREATS HER GOOD, OR I WILL FUCKING HAUNT HIM EVERYDAY EVEN WHEN I DIE...i might not even want it to happen again.. Aiya i dunno la.... sometimes i think, i dun wanan be hurt again.. i am scare of failure.. i am afraid of everything now...UNLESS SHE GIVES ME THE STRENGTH AGAIN... ^.^

i tend to know who are REALLY good frends, bros or sisters, WHO ARE NOT! BEWARE!!! U WILL BE BLACKLISTED....WHO ARE WEARING A FUCKING MASK AND THINK I DUNNO... I GOT GOOD INSTINCTS.. REMEMBER WALLS HAVE EARS... WHAT U DO NOW, THE TRUTH WILL BE OUT SOONER OR LATER...MY DREAMS ALWAYS COME TRUE... SO U BETTER CHANGE BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE OR RETRIBUTION AND KARMA WILL FALL ON U. TRUST ME MAN!!!!....arrrr.... dun wan talk about it liao... later my life - another 3 yrs...like my evil side coming out more.. LMAO...ok i go liao.. update later.. eyes too dry.. need to lubricate it.. ^.^